A parody of a tragedy

The world we live in is unfortunately getting dumber at a rapid pace. This is not unique to leftists or rightists, although the general pattern that leftists are a few IQ points above the right continues to hold. When I was younger I would have been interested in arguing about subjects like abortion, but I don’t think there’s really a point to it.

To be quite honest, I don’t think there’s much of a point to anything anymore. I spend my days working on my own creative little hobby projects, vaping cannabis or watching birds. I don’t really think it’s possible in our day and age to beat the stock market anymore either, not because the market is efficient, but because it’s impossible to tell when it will behave rationally again. Money is just flooding into the biggest American companies and there is no clear mechanism visible to me that would trigger a correction. I just can’t get myself to invest in bubbles.

The world’s richest man can publicly threaten to impregnate a pop singer and there’s hardly an eyebrow raised at this point. The son of the Republican party nominee for president is posting AI photos of his father as a fat dwarf riding a cat and carrying a gun to rally the base. In my own country, the minister of health refuses to send 30,000 smallpox vaccines to Congo because she thinks Putin might release smallpox. This is the level our world is sinking towards.

And I’m sure some of you will want to argue with me, that all of this is necessary to defeat “woke”, or that the Haitians really are eating pets, or that Putin really might attack us with smallpox, but I find the whole world is just kind of deteriorating to a disgraceful state. The smart people figured this out too. As I said earlier, the guy I voted for brought up that Africa has much higher birth rates than our own country, which will cause trouble in the future. This made a bunch of people angry at him, so now he retreated from public eye, to sit at home burned out again (just like me I guess).

Thanks to democracy you all get the leaders you deserve, but apparently you don’t quite deserve this guy. He didn’t say we’ll need to outbreed the Africans, or make women barefoot and pregnant again, he just suggested we need a serious discussion about this, what it means for our future. I happen to agree with him on this. My suggestion would be to just accept that our birth rates will plunge and to accept that we will most likely be demographically replaced.

It’s like we all wandered deep into a cave and it began to rain. We realize now that we can’t go back, the way we came in is flooded, but we decide to wander deeper into the cave, in search of some way out. There isn’t one, at least not for animals as big as us. The bats and insects still have ways out, we don’t. This is very hard for some people to accept, they want to go to Mars, but we’re stuck here, in the mess we created.

I would recommend to just enjoy what we have available, while you still can. If you look back at today ten years from now and all you remember is working, you’re probably going to regret how you spent your days. You have essentially all music from all around the world available to you for ten euro a month. It won’t be here forever.

I’m useless, unlovable now because I achieve nothing substantial, but I can’t imagine a better life than this. I’m quite happy, but I’ll never manage to convince other people of this. I saw a post of some guy who called off his honeymoon because his wife sent a goodbye text to her high school boyfriend the day before her wedding and I realized I’m not missing out on much.

You’re lucky if someone truly loved you once. That need has been fulfilled for me, so these days I don’t get suicidal anymore the way I did when I was young. I don’t even care that much about growing old and ugly. I find it more unfortunate that I don’t experience the world the way I did when I was a teenager anymore. Cannabis and other drugs allow me to catch a glimpse of how I used to experience it back then.

A small bit of cannabis high in pinene, outside in nature with a bit of music, I don’t know what else a human being might need during this time of the year. It allows you to just completely immerse in sensations, a mindset, a kind of melancholy, imagery and thoughts even, fantasy scenarios of how human history could have unfolded, memories of your teenage years. If I had to choose between cannabis and food, I would grow hungry. If I had to give it up because I ran out of money and had to get a job, I can’t imagine how that would work out. Fortunately I should be able to keep this up for years until I run out of money.

You can now eat exotic fruit your grandparents wouldn’t recognize. I went to Leipzig with a friend once, I bought a pomegranate and he asked me: “Do you think that’s convenient fruit?” And it’s true, it’s not convenient. You can buy a little plastic box with the kernels, after someone in India manually peeled the fruit by hand for you, then the supermarket stores it peeled at 4 degree Celsius for you, so that it doesn’t decay before you eat it, as it was robbed of its natural protection from the elements. That’s what it means to live in the West in our day and age.

Again, none of this insanity is going to last forever. If you were to put a child on the world, the insanity would be over before the child becomes an adult. We’re really late into the game, we already burned down most of the world and the walls that hold the piles of ashes back are starting to collapse.

Your first SARS2 infection reduces your IQ by 3 points on average, the second one by 2. That’s what the studies say. We’re all brain damaged from a new virus, so political debates in the world’s major superpower now revolve around whether or not Haitians are eating people’s pets. We’re sinking into a deep sleep from which we won’t recover, gently fading out of this decaying world, as everything around us grows ridiculous, a parody of a tragedy.

Maybe you think the studies are wrong, maybe you think that’s all bullshit. That’s fine with me. Maybe you think the bird flu won’t go human to human too. Maybe you think we won’t run out of copper and fresh water, maybe you think the soils in Africa and Brazil are not flushing into the ocean, maybe you think we can just start blocking the sun to keep the Earth habitable. We’re not going to convince each other.

If I had to choose a next life in our world, I would probably want to be born as a baby in a middle class household in a small town in the American Midwest in the early 90’s. If you’re going to look for me in a next life, that’s your best bet. But for now I still have things I wish to finish here in this life though, so I’m not in a hurry.

42 Comments

  1. > In my own country, the minister of health refuses to send 30,000 smallpox vaccines to Congo because she thinks Putin might release smallpox.

    And this is what the Minister of Health looks like in your neighbouring country lol:

    https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/weird-news/fat-health-minister-critics-attack-4435156

    “Is she too fat to be a Health Minister? Critics attack 20-stone woman leading Belgium’s battle against obesity”

    I wonder who would win in a fight between her and Caroline van der Plas.

    But OK, I will start vaping cannabis to see if it makes my life more interesting and enjoyable. Because right now, I am bored out of my mind. If you (or anyone else who reads this) can recommend a specific model of a dry herb vaporiser, please let me know. My budget is around €150, hopefully that can get me a good one.

    • I’ve used a PAX vape pen for a while now. It was recommended from someone who engaged often. I have the first model, but there’s a PAX 2 out now. I like it a lot but I’m a lightweight who doesn’t need much. The price looks to be about $116 USD.

  2. You have to hold out until 40. Then suddenly everything becomes malleable. I now do not care that much as you do. 30 years? Well baked in. Societal inertia will save me. Well. at the place where I live. I would recommend to any abled man (or woman, possibly), to relocate to a lifeboat place.
    It will be horrible to see it all unfold. But it will be entertaining. The most interesting times ahead. And me and you are all part of it. Enjoy the ride.

  3. You’re right about the brain damage. I’ve watched my older brother slowly decline in his text messages. He has difficulty explaining things, his spelling and sentence structuring are deteriorating. He couldn’t even remember where our eldest brother was buried.
    Tomorrow I will sin- a piece of blackberry pie with my morning coffee. You’re right, we should enjoy these years that are remaining.

    • Though my life is chasing a dream. Alas there will be a day where the dream comes true, and I will enjoy it even more. It won’t exactly be Heaven, but that’s alright. I’ve been working on myself, I submitted a job application, I’ve been losing weight, showering, brushing my teeth, and I’m about to floss. Thank you Rintrah Radagast your blog has helped me. I got your gift.

  4. I can’t tell you enough how much this essay resonates with me and the direction my thoughts have been converging. Though I’m a bit older than you…I guess you could say I’m a late “bloomer” ?

  5. I feel like I’ve wasted a good lump of my life making myself miserable about things that I could do little to nothing about.

    If I had my time over, I’d probably warn myself off worrying about these matters. Then I’d spend more time trying to give other people good memories.

    Or at least that’s what I say now, but it just wasn’t my nature to do otherwise. Not all of us can reach calm acceptance or turn a blind eye to it.

    And even a lowly worm turns against the boot that crushes it, irrespective of the futility of the act.

    But, I can’t change what I did. I can’t change anything. The system does seem gorked and doomed now, and it’s not really worth saying: “I told you so.”

    Could be time to try to move on with whatever is left of my life, which might be an easier thing to do now that I have less IQ to spend worrying about things.

    But how can I not think about these things? Duty will bring me back around to them, if for no other reason than trying to work out a good location for a ‘lifeboat place’, as per Michael’s suggestion above, to ride out the last part of my life in, not so much for me, but for those I have responsibilities for.

    • It was probably never possible to do anything about it. How do you turn it all around?

      Impossible.

      And with what tools? Logic and reason?

      Hopeless.

      I was just too stupid and ignorant to work that out, and I probably didn’t want to know that it was futile either, which is something that was too defeatist/demoralizing for me to accept.

      If anything could have been done, it would probably have had to start happening at least 50 years ago, which is probably a bit before anyone here could’ve participated in it.

      It’s well and truly out of control now though, so I guess it will just have to burn itself out.

  6. If you also feel that some fundamental aspect of “reality” is breaking down in an unprecedented way, you might be interested in Matt McKinley aka “Quantum of Conscience”

    He’s one of those metaphysical “Truther” channels addressing the Neo-Gnostic nature of reality, although he could be said to be the more hopeful and optimistic of those people. I like him. He’s kind of goofy and funny and talks to himself a lot.

    Whereas many neo-Gnostics and Truthers will attribute the evils of this world to the “Demiurge” or “Archons” or whatever, Matt always had a more hopeful spirit that acknowledged there was a negative force in the universe which he dubbed NOTNILC (Clinton, backwards). His irreverence was meant to deny this negative force any ultimate importance. He believes we are not prisoners in a cage as the Gnostics tend to think, he seemed to believe that we possess far more personal power than we allow ourselves to believe. So he would occasionally get into cat fights with the more pessimistic members of the community.

    But he recently released a video where he seems to be channeling Radagast here. Even as someone who has recognized and acknowledged the “evil” in this world for countless years over hundreds of videos, he now says (after the events of the past couple of months) that he is feeling deeply disturbed by what he is seeing. That there is some sort of “glitch” or crumbling in his mental schema of the world that was unanticipated by his earnest thinking. You can see him here wrestling with the New Reality:

    https://youtu.be/oBfZXoA3lAQ?si=pLnqxeY2yrdQkzgY

    (There’s a lot of in-house jargon and inside jokes only understandable to long term listeners of his, I hope that doesn’t throw anyone new to Matt. He seems like an earnestly good guy, all things considered).

  7. > A small bit of cannabis high in pinene, outside in nature with a bit of music, I don’t know what else a human being might need during this time of the year. It allows you to just completely immerse in sensations, a mindset, a kind of melancholy.

    That’s about as good as it gets. Any time of year.

  8. I’m sorry Rad. This will only last a moment…

    *+#*+^#%=+

    Remember, Rad!!

    You’ll rise to greater heights than that my boy. One day when you’re older, you’ll understand.

    That’s it, Rad!

    Practice makes perfect.

    Now remember what I told you: “Never talk to Strangers”

    You’re probably wondering why I keep appearing in your memories. It is because I have inserted myself in them. Although these memories have been fabricated, to teach you about the Strangers. To give you a lifetime of knowledge in a single syringe.

    You will survive, Rad. You will find strength in yourself. And you will prevail.

    […]

    You’re getting the hang of it, Rad. Maybe one day I’ll be working for you!

    This is the machine The Strangers use to amplify their thoughts. The machine that changes their world. You must take control of it. You MUST make the machine yours.

    I know you can beat them, Rad , but you MUST concentrate….

    There is no time for romance, Rad!!!

    The world can be what you make it.

    You have the power to make anything happen.

    But you must act….NOW

    https://youtu.be/3E8s7UPlykQ?si=Pg81t0VYrJDlUZoi

      • Wouldn’t it be nice to alter our trajectory, even if we were “fated” in some sense?

        > You’re lucky if someone truly loved you once. That need has been fulfilled for me, so these days I don’t get suicidal anymore the way I did when I was young.

        What do you think about the possibility of revisiting that female? “Emma” might become “Anna” but the same dynamics are there…

        https://youtu.be/bBObeZ6Vj3A?si=BD4ui_3AgO7f9zlI

      • “Dark City” begins with a protagonist who turns out to have been something of an incel serial killer who murdered about 6 thots.

        Yet, when waking up bewildered in a bathtub, he had the instinctive care and compassion to rescue a goldfish which had been flopping around on the ground, and gingerly picked it up and placed it in the water of the bathtub.

        Does this character “John Murdoch” remind you of anyone?

        Class?

        Class?

    • Tryptie said he believed tuning was real.

      Surely you lot don’t really believe people can ‘tune’, or that we just make up reality as we go along etc.

      Because, well, that’s just BS.

      Reality doesn’t give a flying fuck about what we want.

      Change reality with your mind?

      Sorry, but that’s just nonsense.

      Extrapolating from quantum experiments, or whatever, that consciousness is base reality?

      Well, maybe it is, but if it is, it’s outside of my control in any meaningful sense.

      If it is, then it’s something else’s consciousness that determines the settings, not me. If it can be manipulated in a significant way, well, it’s not by me either.

      If it was otherwise, then I’d have won the lottery by now.

      • >If it was otherwise, then I’d have won the lottery by now.

        Nah that’s what you think.

        Lacan said the worst thing that can happen to someone is to have their wish fulfilled. It makes life meaningless.

        Your ego doesn’t quite comprehend what makes you happy.

        Fortunately, your higher self has a better understanding of it.

      • Wombat, I am a man very much like yourself in this regard. Was always very hard-nosed.

        I recently got “into it” with my Yoga aunt. I emphasized many of your points.

        She asked me directly, “what is reality?”

        I did my best, but I will admit I struggled to come up with a concise and decisive response.

        • “What is reality?”

          Phillip K Dick said it best: “Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn’t go away.”

          Reality is unwavering in any meaningful sense. Our perception/understanding of reality can be wrong, or incomplete, but reality can’t ever be wrong or incomplete – it is perfectly real, our understanding isn’t.

          I’ll relay the story of the joker who wrote a post-structuralism/post-modernist critique of physics. After he was published, he invited anyone who didn’t believe in physics to come up to his apartment on the 13th floor and step off the balcony into space.

          Thus, we find that one cannot simply point out some arbitrary decision that happened in a given thing, then use that arbitrary decision to relativize all of reality, or even a model of reality.

          More seriously, can we know anything at all to an absolute certainty?

          Perhaps not. Personally, I doubt it.

          I believe that only ultimate reality gets to be ultimate reality.

          The best we can do is make a model of it.

          But I maintain that even though our model of reality may be flawed, and our perceptions may be flawed, that reality itself exists.

          How do I know?

          Because I have experienced the unbending nature of reality. Reality doesn’t negotiate. Reality doesn’t change because I want it to be different. Reality just is.

          But look, if my higher self is responsible for this shitshow, then I want to meet him so I can kick him in his/my nuts – with my/his left foot that doesn’t have gout.

          • > Phillip K Dick said it best: “Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn’t go away.”

            Hahahahahaha!!!

            I quoted that exact PKD line to her. I had that one in my chamber.

            I also quoted Ayn Rand, “You may evade reality, but you cannot evade the consequences of evading reality”

            Yet, somehow, given the context of the conversation (which you are missing here) it just didn’t seem to “hit” or “land” as I expected it to. My aunt, despite certain blind-spots, can be a formidable interlocutor on certain issues.

          • Wombat, I’m too knackered to get into the weeds of the bulk of your comment (I was once a philosophy major) but:

            > But look, if my higher self is responsible for this shitshow, then I want to meet him so I can kick him in his/my nuts – with my/his left foot that doesn’t have gout.

            Agreed!

  9. “If I had to choose a next life in our world, I would probably want to be born as a baby in a middle class household in a small town in the American Midwest in the early 90’s.”

    I assume you mean the 1890s, not the 1990s?

    Though there is an interesting point here. Someone born in the same town in the American Midwest in the 1890s would have more vulnerability to diseases and accidents than the same person in the 1990s, and less tech (just a little, they still get cars and mass media), but much more opportunity to do something interesting with their lives. And this is before forecasting what might happen after 2024, when the 1990s guy would be about thirty.

    Being born in the same location in the 1790s wouldn’t be good, since you would be an American Indian, one century before Wounded Knee. Interesting how that works.

    • >I assume you mean the 1890s, not the 1990s?

      Nope. I have grown to accept I am intimately tied to this era. I would just want a less bleak version of it for my teenage self than the Rotterdam version.

  10. “If I had to choose a next life in our world, I would probably want to be born as a baby in a middle class household in a small town in the American Midwest in the early 90’s.”

    So it’s established you mean the 1990s. Still a poor choice.

    It’s over a decade since I realized I was born in the perfect year, give or take a few — 1955, unless you were gay and ended up with AIDS. Too soon before that and you missed out on the internet and ebikes when they could have mattered in your life. Later, and too much of your life will be spent in the post-9/11 post Patriot Act world of war, global surveillance and just global everything including slo-mo collapse. Not to mention the music.

    But what got me started thinking along those lines was travel. Or how it’s changed since my first big trip abroad in 1975, three months in Europe. Travel is so much more convenient today and way less interesting, and that’s a problem unless your old, like people born in 1955.

    So not only was 1955 a great time to be born, 2025 is a great time to be old.

  11. I have relatives who were born to a middle class family in the 1990s in a small town in the MidWest. The three kids are decadent in a worrisome way and are all enormously fat. I have a relative in small town New England who has three kids who are in the same age bracket and the two girls are enormously fat (the boy eats LSWM keto and is not fat). I guess being born in the 1990s in the U.S. is good if you want to be gigantic.

  12. Wombat:

    >Perhaps your Aunt can use her yoga powers to identify who among us has Rimmer for a higher self?

    Aha! Many years since I’ve been reminded of Red Dwarf

    I was a fan many years ago and imagined myself as Dave at the time. (Who wouldn’t?)

    Alas, I’ve come to realize I’m just another Arnold Rimmer.

    (Bad influences in my life, you could say. Perhaps things would’ve been different if I had been brought up by stout Aussies, such as yourself(?))

  13. Ha, ha, ha – after watching that again, I have to admit that I could also see the Rimmer in me.

    Nevertheless, I reject this concept that every victim’s own ‘higher Rimmer’ is responsible for their own misfortunes.

    Talk about gaslighting on steroids.

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