This is my personal blog. Who am I? I prefer to remain anonymous, because anonymity allows me to share thoughts and ideas that would be difficult for me to share without my anonymity. What I will say is that I’m a young ethnically Dutch man from a working class background. I live on the margins of society, but that is a voluntary choice, because that is where the interesting things happen. You’ll have to judge my thoughts on their own basis, you can’t take them for granted based on some appeal to authority, I don’t have a Phd to show you that I’m an expert who can’t possibly be wrong on whatever I happen to discuss.

I’ve been writing throughout my life, but for the past three years or so I have been collecting my thoughts here, because I miss the old days when the Internet was far more decentralized and DIY. There are a number of reasons I write. There are a few subjects I have studied closely that I find worthwhile to share my thoughts on, primarily health related subjects and ecological overshoot. I’ve been vegetarian for almost twenty years now, nutrition has always been an interest of mine as a result.

On the other hand, there is the simple fact that writing can be for me a therapeutic cathartic experience. I spend every day noticing things in my personal environment that are impolite or taboo to discuss. For me to write down those thoughts can be a liberating experience.

Because I use my blog as a platform to discuss taboo thoughts, you’ll probably encounter some ideas that may offend you. Regardless of whether you’re old or young, white or black, rich or poor, you probably benefit from having a thick skin if you want to read my blog. Political correctness is ultimately a form of classism to me: Rich children are taught what you’re allowed to say, poor children have to figure it out on their own.

Another thing I should note is that I have an intentionally abrasive writing style. I generally try to write in a manner that comes directly from the heart, because I consider polemics filled with emotional rhetoric to be more entertaining to read myself. Your writing style needs to be entertaining in the Internet era, or people won’t read it. I tend to think that life would have been easier for me if people had been honest to me more often, so I try to be blatantly honest myself.

That doesn’t mean however that my own mindset about the world does not evolve. I try to continually expose myself to new information and if you read something I wrote two years ago, there’s a fair chance that I now think differently about it. Overall, I would argue that I’m more left wing and cosmopolitan these days, whereas I used to see myself as right wing and particularist.

There are a few reasons for that. To start with, it became clear to me that climate change is a huge problem, but that only people on the political left take the issue seriously. Even right wingers who claim to be “green conservatives” tend to come up with all sorts of ridiculous nonsense in an effort to pretend that climate change is not a serious issue.

When it became clear to me that the left has it right on this, I became more willing to entertain other left wing ideas. A big breaking point for me was when I attended a talk by an indigenous South American woman in the Netherlands. It became clear to me that in her own country she feels the exact same subjective experience of marginalization that I’ve felt by being born into a working class white family.

For a long time now, I have thought of myself as some sort of old school socialist. I think people like Trump and other far-right figures are very effective at manipulating poor whites into thinking that other poor people are the cause of their situation, instead of an economic system geared to favor the wealthy.

I have also taken a very large number of psychedelics over the years, particularly Psilocybe mushrooms and Mescaline cactuses. This has led me to feel a much greater sense of affinity with other people. A lot of writing you’ll find here is inspired by psychedelics or represents my effort to uncover how they affect our bodies and our minds.

Generally speaking, I’m bad at responding to comments, but I read all of them. I try to get better at that. The main reason I’m bad at responding is because it already takes me a lot of effort to finish an essay. I’ve figured out over the years that I have to write something in one go, based on some sort of internal passion, or it risks ending up shelved and forever unpublished because I start to doubt everything I wanted to share. I’m quite proud of the fiction archive, most of these short stories were written in one sitting.

Besides writing about psychedelics and ecology I try to expose people to fringe ideas and underground culture. I used to expose people to far more fringe ideas, but over the years I have developed a much better intuition for filtering out bullshit. Instead, these days I like to think that I expose you to ideas you’ll hear about from your own environment a few months later. With that said, the only way to discover what I truly have to share and whether it might interest you is to start reading.


  1. Great content and horrifyingly well thought out in regards to the dark future that awaits us all. However you might want to consider changing the colour scheme. Yellowish text on a black background is physically painful to read and I have to paste everything into word so I don’t get a headache…

  2. Do you have a disposable email that you can be contacted at? I was kind of wondering if I could email you a question and maybe have some discussion on it. I think it would help me tremendously.

  3. Hi,
    Were you previously u/accountt1234 on reddit? I read your analysis on Adam Lanza/school shootings and found it very insightful and conherent.

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