I just want to say thank you to everyone who spared a thought for me or left a comment. I’ve felt very unwell in recent weeks and so I’m genuinely thankful that people care. It’s a very strange phenomenon for which I don’t have a proper explanation yet, it doesn’t appear drug-related, I haven’t had cannabis in over a month, nor did I have it in the weeks before my acute psychosis.
It’s really embarrassing for me to have suffered acute psychosis, but more importantly, it’s a horrifying experience, for which I still receive medication. In recent days I’ve had recurring periods, of very negative harmful thoughts invading my mind. This tends to be very exhausting and it’s accompanied by an awful headache in my forehead. The odd thing is that it tends to come and go in waves, I can be so exhausted I can only lay in bed during the afternoon, but then a few hours later I’m jogging in the gym, which really seems to help.
I’m trying really hard to figure out what’s causing this, my gut tells me it’s some kind of recurring infection. I try to take good care of my teeth. I take my vitamin B12 supplement, along with other dietary supplements like vitamin D. Mostly I spend the days now meditating outside. I tend to do this whenever I feel the acute exhaustion coming up. My mind gets stuck during those periods, yearning to look up all sorts of horrifying information about the world I should not get preoccupied by.
I often feel really useless lately and it’s a painful experience. Whenever I see someone paint a window or do any other sort of physical labor I tend to feel profoundly useless. But the reality is with the way things currently stand, where I have to lay in bed in the middle of the day during periods of acute exhaustion, I’m just not in a position where I can make myself very useful in a conventional sense.
But I don’t really see myself as useless at a fundamental level. Looking back, I do feel like I did a good job, explaining the bird flu problem we have and why it is not just a regular flu. Even if we’re somehow spared a pandemic in humans, it’s very clear that this is causing an ecological catastrophe around the world that’s not being taken seriously. Out of everything I’ve written, I think this is the most important topic.
I try not to be judgmental. I don’t know how other people experience the world, or why they make the choices that they make. There are plenty of things I wish I had done differently. Mostly I just yearn to keep people entertained, I think this is my deepest desire.
There are a lot of horrifying things in this world, but I think at some point you have to accept that not everything is your responsibility. I try to properly explain the sustainability crisis to people, which I think is the biggest problem we’re dealing with and of which bird flu is an outgrowth.
I hope my mind recovers, but either way, I’m really glad to those of you who’ve tried to help me out.
Get well. Rest and drop the internet.
I love reading your thoughts whether they are about the coof or not. I hope you take the time you need to feel better.
We’re sincerely here for you Rad.
Your thoughts are incredibly important to all of us & I hope you recover soon.
You mentioned some of your vitamins/supplements
For what it’s worth, I’ve felt hellish negativity when supplementing B12. No idea why
Don’t believe everything your mind tells you
Get well soon and all the best
Thanks!
Nothing to be embarrassed about. It’s just demons dude. I can read energy to a degree, so I can tell. If anything, they only tend to target and attack people who have something positive about them that is worth undermining, so you could take it as a compliment in a weird sort of way.
Anyway, these intrusive sort of thoughts, they don’t really come from ‘you’ in a sense. It’s a very common phenomenon, I would say almost everyone has this to a certain degree, but you’re experiencing it to a more extreme degree than many do right now because more of these negative entities have targeted you and attached to your energy body. It’s nothing to freak out about, and you do have the intrinsic power to heal this, but it is something I strongly suggest addressing at some point. I know some of this is likely to sound like a stretch to you, but I hope you’ll consider my suggestions seriously.
Hope you feel better soon.
> Anyway, these intrusive sort of thoughts, they don’t really come from ‘you’ in a sense. It’s a very common phenomenon, I would say almost everyone has this to a certain degree, but you’re experiencing it to a more extreme degree than many do right now because more of these negative entities have targeted you and attached to your energy body. I
I would like that to be the case. It would imply there is an “Other” to fight against.
I’ve lived with sleep disturbances for most of my adult life. After extensive research and untold number of “sleep hacks” I’ve concluded that I’m simply “built different”. I simply cannot stop my obsessive rumination about “Life And The Universe” which disallows be from experiencing deep and restful sleep. Your narrative about negative entities targeting thoughtful folks to keep them waking up to the reality of the Simulation/Matrix makes a bit of sense, but then I’m left wondering what to do about it.
As I alluded to in another comment, it’s probably best for Rad to stop ruminating over putative events he has no control over. Ruminating over such ephemera can be one small window into which psychosis enters.
Rad, start from the beginning.
Think of yourself as a baby God
You are just now awakening to the phenomena around you. You have no idea about what’s “actually going on”
You only know what you can see hear and touch in your immediate environment.
This will ground you. Don’t let your mind spiral into “but what about…”
(That’s your ego/pride fucking with you. )
When I was a wee lad just making his first baby steps into psychedelic space, I was fortunate enough to have known an experienced couple (my own Sasha and Ann Shulgin) who babysat my first Ketamine experiences. While I was lying on the living room floor and starting to freak out, the wife placed her hand on my forehead and repeated the lyrics from some 90s raver song: “It doesn’t matter…it doesn’t matter…it doesn’t matter”.
That was one of the better techniques I experienced when my feverish ego got too out of hand.
>I would like that to be the case. It would imply there is an “Other” to fight against.
There absolutely is.
>Your narrative about negative entities targeting thoughtful folks to keep them waking up to the reality of the Simulation/Matrix makes a bit of sense, but then I’m left wondering what to do about it.
That’s why I keep saying people should be energy training. This isn’t necessarily directed at you, but I’ve noticed people seem to have trouble understanding how important it is to do this.
It feels like I’m trying to teach germ theory to people from the middle ages here. Yes, these things are real even though you cannot physically see them. Yes, it is crucially important that you address their existence by energy training and clearing them from your energy body, even if nobody around you is doing so. Note that everyone in the world has been getting physically and mentally ill lately; the energetic state of the world has been getting worse generally for at least several decades now. I feel like people have trouble understanding that this stuff is every bit as real as any physical object you interact with in your day to day life. The beings that feed off of us, are energetic, and training your own energetic strength and learning ways to erase these beings is how you fight that. I’m always open to sharing any information I have about energy training techniques or resources, but oftentimes people seemed uncurious. If you train sufficiently, it will become obvious that many of the things I’ve mentioned are real because you’ll be able to perceive some of them for yourself.
I guess the reason I place such an emphasis on it too is because this stuff literally saved my life. It sucks to repeatedly sound the alarm about something and feel like almost nobody ever truly listens (massive credit to Low Status White Sensitive Man for starting to energy train tho tbh). I get that it sounds weird and “out there” and might be hard for people for that reason. The truth is really fucking weird.
>As I alluded to in another comment, it’s probably best for Rad to stop ruminating over putative events he has no control over.
I generally agree yeah. The thing is that the rumination is a form of intrusive thought too, like Radagast most likely already agrees with you on this point.
>Think of yourself as a baby God
Correct! Although, technically, it might not be strictly correct to say you’re a baby in the sense that your soul has likely been around for an extremely long time prior to you incarnating here, but it still might be a useful framework to think about it all anyway yeah.
You’re not the only one Tryptie. I feel the same about the existence of unseen forces/beings that sometimes are antagonistic. Afaik only one civilization in history denies the existence of such beings. That civilization is of course our current western industrial civilization. Like every other civilization we think that ours is the summum of all possible human knowledge so if our priests (the scientists aka experts) don’t acknowledge a phenomenon then it cannot exist… It’s a sad state of affairs as our more subtle bodies can just as easily be harmed as our material one.
PS In case someone is interested in the findings of some open minded psychologists, these books are interesting:
“An Amazing Journey Into the Psychotic Mind – Breaking the Spell of the Ivory Tower” by Jerry Marzinsky Sherry Swiney
“Demonic Foes: My Twenty-Five Years as a Psychiatrist Investigating Possessions, Diabolic Attacks, and the Paranormal” by Richard Gallagher
I feel we are in a titanic fight between good and evil. The anti humanism has reached its peak. Humans are being seen as vermin, pest of the earth, some of you share this satanic and dark worldview which culminated in the mass C shots. Look at this video from John Campbell. He doesnt even cover every aspect of the shroud.https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YT1R2kDPHFA
Mindblowing.
Anti humanism has reached a peak, because humans too have reached a peak. There are a lot of us humans and very few wild animals left in the world. It is very clear to me that our world is in deep trouble.
But I don’t claim to have the ultimate answer to this problem. I pray that God delivers a merciful solution to our predicament for us humans.
I religiously check your blog daily to see if you have updates. I sincerely hope you are able to get past this malaise.
In the earlier stages of the special military operation, I was reading updates, particularly on TheSaker.is daily, always anticipating since major decisive shift. But many things just are not like that, so I decided not to focus on it.
I think the vaxdemic and bird flu are the same; just a slow grind into hell. It is not healthy to obsess about a topic over which you have no power.
I check often daily too. The comments and posts are interesting and thought provoking.
> It is not healthy to obsess about a topic over which you have no power.
This
Hang in there.
Some things take a bit of pain and time to work through.
Go easy on yourself.
Hi Radagast, wat naar dat de psychose weer opstak de afgelopen dagen. Je wordt flink uitgedaagd door die shit.
Weet dat wat je doet ontzettend waardevol is. Je schrijfsels en goede adviezen t.a.v. de Coof en andere onzin hebben mij en veel anderen belangrijke helderheid gebracht. De meesten van ons kunnen niet al die studies doornemen, kritisch bekijken en de relevante conclusies verwoorden, maar jij kan dat wel en stelt het ook nog eens gratis ter beschikking. Dank je wel!!
By the way, heb je ook wel eens aan niet-materiele oorzaken van je problemen gedacht? In het verleden zag ik soms een post van jou op de forums van JMGreer. JMG en sommige anderen zien dat er een flinke berg negatief karma op weg is naar de materiële dimensie. Op dit moment zien ze het bewegen door het astrale met de voorlopers in de etherische dimensie. Volgende stop: het materiële. Deze negatieve blob kan leiden tot allerlei problemen zoals slecht slapen, heftige dromen, fysieke klachten, etc. Ik herken dit zelf ook wel. De afgelopen 2 maanden had ik erg veel last gehad van mijn neurologische issues en op zijn forum zijn er meldingen dat meer mensen in clusters last te krijgen van gekke neurologische aandoeningen. Het zou me niet verbazen als jouw issues hierdoor ook aangewakkerd of zelfs veroorzaakt worden. Heb je wel eens gedacht aan een beschermingsritueel zoals JMG’s SOP (Sphere of Protection) of hulp vragen aan bv aartsengel Michael?
Overigens lijkt er ook het nodige met darm gedoe te spelen in onze maatschappij. Ik merk het zelf ook terwijl ik ongevaxt ben en gezond eet. Mij helpt een dieet met genoeg vezels en gefermenteerd voedsel (kefir, zuurkool, tempeh etc).
Especially if it is an infection, enum4 may be right about trying methylene blue. That is what I use for mood (8 drops per day of 1 percent solution, dropped into an empty capsule). Unfortunately you’d absolutely have to be off of any other mental meds first, and if the prescribed meds are helping now that is a complication. But if it really is an infection, methylene blue should help; it is an antiviral and antibacterial and anti fungal and anti prion and it crosses the blood brain barrier.
You have done loads of useful things already, and you’ll do loads of useful things in the future. It is okay to take time to heal. Healing isn’t instantaneous.
> Especially if it is an infection, enum4 may be right about trying methylene blue.
Sorry, I have to disagree.
I’ve now seen far too many anecdotal reports of methylene blue causing paradoxically negative experiences among people.
This is a good moment to emphasize that our knowledge of human biochemistry is not an exact science. Autistically thinking one can derive “Ideal Treatments” through some textbook understanding of mitochondrial processes is just another example of hubris.
I am far more conservative in this regard.
Encouraging MB based on a limited number of health-influencers and speculations is no different than encouraging Elon’s brain chips or whatever.
Sorry.
It’s working wonderfully for me. And there are a reasonable number of studies supporting its use (enum4 listed some in the comment section of Rintrah’s last post). I haven’t seen the negative anecdotes you have; maybe there’s more of a risk for Rintrah than I would guess. But prescribed psychiatric drugs absolutely have risks. He is on them now and not doing well. And he believes he has an infection. What could he take instead for an infection? In the brain?
Even “health.com” is okay with methylene blue: https://www.health.com/methylene-blue-rfkjr-11679635. It’s nearly mainstream.
> I haven’t seen the negative anecdotes you have;
Many tales told on the Ray Peat Forum over the past few years (reminder that they are all geeks eager to take any and all substances if they think it will boost something or other).
(Not that I’m one to point any fingers)
In my rough estimation, 70% percent of users report benefits, a good 30% (or more) report negative experiences, some quite bad.
There are a few “health supplements” with this same sort of paradoxical ratio.
Finesteride, Vitamin A and E, GABA, to name just a few.
I’m not suggesting you do anything other than what you’re doing. If it’s working for you, then great. But as others have noted, “supplements” which have this sort of direct and immediate perceivable effect, are essentially DRUGS, and come with the same downsides of taking any other pharmarceutical.
There was (and is) a huge contingent who sing the praises of Thiamine (B1), often taking megadoses of Allthiamine, Bentofiamine, and other analogs.
They will sing the praises of all the “energy” they feel.
But how different is this than taking “””drugs”””??
(And if you bother to read closely, you will encounter the stories of those who megadosed on B1 only to have negative effects later)
Anyway, I know you are smart and conscientious, so I won’t belabor the point.
>There was (and is) a huge contingent who sing the praises of Thiamine (B1), often taking megadoses of Allthiamine, Bentofiamine, and other analogs.
>They will sing the praises of all the “energy” they feel.
>But how different is this than taking “””drugs”””??
“Drugs” has always seemed like a vague fluent word to me, applicable to all sorts of things humans ingest. Chamomille and valerian tea could be considered a drug too.
It’s spring. Did you eat the usual half kg of wild garlic/wilde knoflook?
Hey bro.
I’ve added what I hope have been supportive comments several times over the past few weeks as you’ve been struggling with this. If you’ll allow me to do so again: you’re a good guy, you’re inherently valuable, and you’ll get through this.
If we were in the same room I’d give you a hug. We’re not, so here, have a virtual one.
Good luck on your recovery journey sir.
I’m happy you’re recovering. Stay strong, I believe in you.
Sending you good wishes once again, hope you get better soon.
I too am trying some lifestyle interventions in an attempt to lower brain inflammation and improve my own mental health issues. I wrote in a comment late last year about how I stopped eating pork and dairy. Unfortunately I relapsed over the Christmas period but am now back on the wagon since 5th March (Ash Wednesday, first day of lent). I have given up:
– Pork
– Dairy
– Gluten
– Seed oils (please don’t judge me)
– Sugar (Except for fruit and a bit of 70%+ dark chocolate)
– Alcohol
And now I am going to cut out eggs (for now at least). Honestly, part of this is vanity. I am trying to get rid of mild acne and dermatitis on my face and the albumin in eggs is a common allergen.
But I am still eating some lamb, sorry about that. Here, lambs are outside in the fields 300+ days of the year, so at least they are not stuck in factory farms. Yes I know, it is still immoral to eat them, and that “humane slaughter” is an oxymoron, and that 100 hectares of native woodland will sequester much more carbon from the atmosphere than 100 hectares of grassland for livestock grazing. In an ideal world we would all eat bivalves/mollusks but the oceans are too polluted for that shit. If I reincarnate as a grass fed lamb raised to feed low IQ LSWMs then so be it. If you and Tryptie and Low Status White Sensitive Man and the other vegans who read this blog hate me for eating ruminants, that’s OK, I completely understand. I was a vegan for a couple of years in my early 20s. As Mehen has said before, it’s not our fault that the Archons/Demiurge have designed this realm in which life feeds on life. I mean, take the topic of your last post, acetyl L-carnitine. What’s the best source of ALCAR (and creatine, another natural antidepressant)? Red meat. WHY DOES IT HAVE TO BE DESIGNED THIS WAY???!!!
Sorry for the rant.
(Datura seeds still haven’t arrived.)
> WHY DOES IT HAVE TO BE DESIGNED THIS WAY???!!!
Don’t beat yourself up too much about it.
You clearly have a conscience and that’s the most important thing. It shows you are a human and not an NPC that never considers these matters.
Don’t beat yourself if you can’t measure up to hardcore purists like Rad and Tryptie.
I think you’re doing just fine.
get more SUN LIGHT
that might help
Natural sunlight is the best medicine. In our hemisphere, Netherlands, Germany etc, Vitamin D is produced by the sun only between April and October. So most of us who dont take supplements, are now Vit deficient. Sunbath if possible daily.
“But the fool on the hill sees the sun going down.” I think you have made some stellar contributions and thank you for them, I hope you can continue to shed light on the situation as it develops.
Sorry to hear you are still not feeling well. “I’m not feeling that good myself” and find some comfort in the music of Roger Robinson, who I feel blessed to have known a bit and seen perform numerous times. He was something of a God of music, to me, and one project I hope to get to is to make many people aware of him. There’s a song, pic and quote at RogerRobinson.org (the quote is just an off-the-cuff remark he made one night in a bar where he was playing) and I also put a song of his (from about 25 years later and 15 years after he caught AIDS) at KaylaMueller.com. If you want to hear more let me know.
Drop the Internet for a few days Rad!
If money and time are no issues, and you’re currently not into travelling around you could also look into a residential program of the Monroe Institute. https://www.monroeinstitute.org/
One week in which you meditate a lot and with some luck you get one of those non- substance induced out-of-body experiences. Along with some like- minded people. Or lets say as like- minded as strangers can get I guess.
“The Liberation of Consciousness from Identification with Form” could also help you to get some new thoughts. Oh and dont forget Steven Kaufmans other book, “Unified Reality Theory”, for which I was too retarded.
Well wishes are for people who are kind to others. You are judgemental and you make insinuations about people you don’t even know. So, no well wishes for you. Not deserved.
Do you have a concrete goal in life and a plan for working towards it?
Working on a goal keep you mentally stable and balances dopamine and serotonin.
Try Jordan Petersons future auhtoring programme.
You have immense potential. Let me know if youd like help to tame it and realize it
Jordan Peterson performs in Ziggo Dome 17 May in Amsterdam. Go there Rintrah! You are a valuable person
Every man needs a mission in life. Mine is art.
>Every man needs a mission in life.
How does a neophyte choose among the many “missions” this life has to offer?
Some would tell me “following Jesus” is the Correct Mission. Others would tell me “following the Grateful Dead/Phish on tour” is the Correct Mission. How does one discern?
And by the way, what is the significance of any particular “mission” — what is the Telos? Is it simply to distract oneself from the horrifying nature of the prison-like Realm we all inhabit? Mere distraction and preoccupation?
>Mine is art.
Glad to hear it. You have chosen “sublimation”, one of the “better choices” as Zapffe would have put it.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Last_Messiah
Forgive me for asking, but does your art reach anyone, let alone “touch” anyone?
Or do you do your thing solo, in your bedroom or studio, as I once did?
I sold via brick and mortar Galleries. But even if someone makes art only for himself, if it heals, if it helps, why not. Whatever works. Painting is meditation.
Nietzsche failed terribly in his effort to replace the message of the Christ and he payed the price.
>I sold via brick and mortar Galleries.
*sigh*
time for me to die
>Nietzsche failed terribly in his effort to replace the message of the Christ and he payed the price.
Indeed. He should have realized the true message of Christ — to release all of humanity from the bondage of Yahweh/Yaldabaoth
Cathari FTW
Peace of mind ist so valuable.
My heart breaks for you. I have that too: harmful and disturbing thoughts that invade my mind. I noticed relieve by learning prayers by heart and recite them in my mind. I say the prayer Ave Maria, and the Holy Father in my mind when such bad thoughts overwhelm me. It really helps, and I am not the first person who has noticed that.
I wouldn’t feel embarrassed about suffering from these symptoms, it happens to a lot of people, I used to have trouble with anxiety / depression too. It can be very difficult and taxing on a person, I wish you the best and I hope you make a full recovery soon.
Thanks I appreciate it!
Get well dude, your blog is a pleasure to read and has changed me for the better.
Thanks so much!
I don’t always agree with you and your prose can go off the rails on certain topics but your knowledge/understanding of biology is deep and I am thankful you share it.
I sincerely hope you get well soon. This world is fucked up for sure and it is difficult to find happiness within it. I hope you find a sustained happiness soon.
Thank you Tito.
I hope you take the time to learn about Toxic Bile Theory. Start with this video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JTdfRu_OFv0&t=1499s
Then watch #53.
You can heal.
I will look into it, thanks.
Voorspoedig herstel gewenst Radagast. Je blogs zijn onderdeel geworden van mijn dagelijkse ritueel ???? Het lezen geeft mij altijd een gevoel van connectie met mijn eigen gedachtes en gevoel, bedankt. En stay strong
Dankjewel! <3
I recommend the book “Psychiatric Drug Withdrawal: A Guide for Prescribers, Therapists, Patients and their Families” by Peter Breggin. Most of it is the possible side effects, but it’s also the best for how to eventually get off the drugs. Easy does it, as I recall, one drug at a time, down 10% every 2 weeks or so, as tolerated. I think the antidepressant are the most destabilizing, in a psychosis.
I believe in a great future for mankind for those of us who survive this tumultous times. Not beeing injected is a good start. Keep in mind that the times we live in are the most eruptous (?) ever in human history. Its high speed and it happens on a
global scale. Of course people are overwhelmed and confused. Never has mankind experienced such dramatic change in such a short time. Its mindblowing. And if this gets settled without a world war we are very lucky. An old world is dying and a new one is not yet being born. What a time to be alive. I find it very unboring.
Sorry to hear you’re struggling. I enjoy your insights. Might consider stopping drug use. I can’t imagine that’s good for the mind. Marijuana causes psychosis in lots of people. Also might think about not being so angry at the world or people who see the world differently than you do (LSWMs, meat-eaters, MAGAs, etc). Having that much disdain for the world isn’t healthy. Try to find something you enjoy. Try to find a girlfriend. That might help a lot.
Yeah I haven’t had cannabis in months by now. But I’m not sure cannabis caused it, as I had stopped taking it weeks before.
I’m glad you ultimately are doing better. I hope you continue your journey towards the ultimate root of your misery and some form of resolution, whatever that looks like.
The truth is that most people suffer, I too suffer, but most people are putting on a show for an audience and so they either hide that fact of their character or pounce on others’ weaknesses to try to feel strong. I appreciate that you at least have the authenticity to admit to your suffering.
I reread your post and I have a more occult theory of what may be afflicting you. It’s not for discussion here, however. Is there some email I could s send to or something?
Hi,
You can use my pseudonymous email adres if you want, Abdullah.ElBahraoui@hotmail.com.
Thanks.
I also wanted to send you some valuable information. It’s the kind that can really help you. I would like to share what I have found about your condition. The knowledge I have, you won’t find it here. But your email doesn’t work. I would be happy to send it to you, since I believe it could help you a great deal.
As a sociopath I have zero sympathy for a young rich man who feels depressed.
Do not give a single fuck.
But I still enjoy reading this blog and getting into the head of RR. He writes very clearly and it’s interesting.
After posting this I took an Internet test on sociopathy and it confirmed what I’ve suspected.
Sociopath but not psychopath.
Good luck, Rintrah.
Not that I actually care.
Oh, dear…this is much more than just feeling depressed.If it would be just that it would be easily fixable. But since you haven’t been in his shoes, there is no way for you to know the gravity of the situation.
Finally, someone here who gets it. It is not just depression. If sunlight and exercise cured psychosis, LA and Arizona wouldn’t be open air psychosis wards for homeless people (but sadly they are). But figuring out the underlying cause of psychosis; can that be done?? If anyone can figure this out, maybe Rintrah can. With whatever external help he can get, in the meantime.
I think he should consider trying olive leaf extract (https://www.nature.com/articles/s41598-023-29287-4#:~:text=Oleuropein%20(OLE)%2C%20a%20polyphenolic,was%20taken%20for%20dose%20standardisation.); it crosses the blood brain barrier. It is pretty safe; it doesn’t have the issues that e.g. methylene blue has. This study was re Parkinson’s disease but it still looks interesting.
I hope you feel better soon.
Thanks Michelle!
I have heard that if you use your brain too much, the fatigue substances produced by brain activity cannot be metabolized in time and tend to accumulate in the brain, which can lead to various disorders and diseases. In that case, I think you need to spend your time in a way that does not put a strain on your brain in order to recover. Please take care of yourself.
Strain On The Brain
sounds like the name of a good rock band.
Yes, it sounds like that “balls to the wall” song by that German rock band.
Charlie, you strike me as a really nice person, not a sociopath or rascal.
Re. using the brain, I think you can use it a lot and be happy, average, or unhappy.
That famous scientist Feynman must have used his brain a lot, and he seemed happy.
He lived in a nicer era than we do now though.
Then there are people who are more similar to vegetables. There are happy or unhappy vegetables.
Dan, you are very perceptive.
I actually am nice in person, unless I’m in a whisky rage.
Funny thing about Feynman I’ve heard is that he had a relatively low IQ for all that he accomplished
I’ve heard that too. Maybe when he took his IQ test his mind was on other things, like fixing radios or cracking combination locks, so he logged a “low” score. He probably wasn’t arsed, as there was loads he could he do in the real world.
Your brain is literally always active and doing things, unless you’re dead.
Thanks for the suggestion, I try to meditate to cleanse my brain.
>The truth is really fucking weird
Amen to that.
I don’t know how to help, but I hope you’ll get better. Mind symptoms are uniquely scary to me.
I’m still reading your blog since the covid fiasco that was already quite long ago and I always enjoy your writing. Cheers!
Thanks Ed!
Go to this guy’s shop:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6EK2B6cFBQo
After you buy some gear, you will then be too busy thinking about staying upright than to worry about schizo thoughts. I took it up a few years ago. When you get your balance back, then everything fixes itself.
>After you buy some gear, you will then be too busy thinking about staying upright than to worry about schizo thoughts. I took it up a few years ago. When you get your balance back, then everything fixes itself.
Why bother with inline skates? They are unnecessarily challenging when regular roller skates allow for more interesting games
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fx7JqGsNIeE
Try feeling depressed or suicidal whilst doing in-line skating.
It is impossible.
95% of your mental capacity is committed to focusing on simply staying upright.
The other 5% is occupied by dodging obstacles, such as E-bikes.
Regular skates cannot achieve this end result.
@retard: “you will then be too busy thinking about staying upright than to worry about schizo thoughts.”
It’s definitely the cure for anxiety and depression. Skateboarding is also an awesome alternative, and for those of us over 40, longboarding is an excellent option. Or you could become an ultra distance runner, it’s the best natural antidepressant. Rintrah talks so much about going to the gym, but unless you are lifting Olympic level weights, you don’t need to go to the fucking gym, you just need to get the fuck outside. Calisthenics is the answer, and adding wheels, makes it very fun.
You are correct. My next purchase will be a street board of some description and then a surfboard. I have a 8’10” Fanatic All-Wave surf paddle board for now. Balance is the key – stay nimble and tippy-toed. I am into barefoot running.
My question however is, how do you get to Sesame Street? I went on the A-Train as directed, but I could not find the right station to get off?
Get well and don’t feel embarassed. This song seems appropriate:
What are you trying to say, I’m crazy?
When I went to your schools, I went to your churches
I went to your institutional learning facilities
So how can you say I’m crazy?”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LoF_a0-7xVQ
Thanks!
The last thing RR needs is more drugs
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-R83SndBVSY
Rintrah, ghet better soon. Some random thoughts:
1) It is okay to be slightly neurodivergent or a little bit not-completely-sane. You do not need to try to be perfectly mentally healthy, as few people are this way anyway.
2) Do not use any fun substances
3) The world does not need to have your opinion delivered every day. Relax and just post about your little enjoyments. I will still read them, it would be better than the pompous nonsense that others produce.
4) Try to drop as much of your supplements as you can, especially mental enhancement supplements, other than the vegan supplements
5) Get out more often, like to nature, the beach, and get some tan.
I also realized that frequent conspiracy posting was bad for my mind, and stepped back for a bit. I have a lot to lose (family, net worth etc) and I do not want to lose it just to grow an audience.
I hope that you get better soon and your troubles do not diminish my respect for you in any way.
>3) The world does not need to have your opinion delivered every day. Relax and just post about your little enjoyments. I will still read them, it would be better than the pompous nonsense that others produce.
Good advice. I remember reading something Rad wrote on JMG’s site, telling new readers to his blog that he posts intermittently — that sometimes he will post in a rapid-fire fashion, but then go “dark” for an extended period of time. This is how it used to be, but I noticed that for the past couple months he has been posting nearly daily.
That was fine with me, since it allowed me to inject my drunken nonsense, but now that you remind me of it, it tells me Rad was slowly dissolving into some kind of mania or psychosis.
He should go back into hibernation for awhile, as he used to, let go of the TDS, and digest some Deep Shit and come back with a banger.
Here’s to hoping
Thanks a lot Igor!
You are welcome. Very possibly, your brain was good and functional to begin with, and the supplements were mostly fine, except for a couple that interacted with the mushrooms or you overdosed on something. So drop all of them just to be safe; you have an amazing brain that doesn’t need chemical stimulation.
Hopefully one day you wake up from what the Al Gore Idioms are feeding you and you realise that CO2 only makes up 0.04% of the Earths atmosphere.
Become the Doomslayer
Fight Cassandra, she’s a complex oul bitch.
What is so difficult about understanding that a certain compound in the right context, can have an outsized effect on something even if it is present in only a small concentration, or even if the incremental change in concentration is only a small fraction of the total substance?
Dude I posted this a while ago as a joke but I’m serious: GET CHECKED FOR BORDERLINE PERSONALITY DISORDER.
“it tends to come and go in waves, I can be so exhausted I can only lay in bed during the afternoon, but then a few hours later I’m jogging in the gym”
I’ve been flowing your blog for almost a decade, maybe more if you had that one prieur-associated blog that was deleted. I have always connected to your ideas and thinking style. I have had acute psychosis. I have extreme mood swings that I spent 20 years trying to diagnose.
And recently, I have been diagnosed as borderline. It shares maybe symptoms with Asperger’s but it’s a completely different animal (though you can have both).
I’m not diagnosing you but go check out “Hard to Love” by Joseph Nowinsk if you are interested. BPD is completely different in males
Your writing and thinking is genius but clearly shows black/white thinking and “splitting”where something becomes all good or all bad. This is me too. For you sake I hope I’m just projecting, but if not you can fix it.
I’ve got therapy recommendations and supplements that will help immensely if you end up finding you have it. Good luck, king
Thanks man. I’ve considered borderline too. Honestly, all these terms seem like they’re trying to describe an elephant from different directions. What’s the difference between autism and schizoid personality?
I don’t think I necessarily have extreme mood swings though, mostly just swings in energy level, although my energy tends to be low.
> What’s the difference between autism and schizoid personality?
Apparently ASD is neurological while SPzD is neuro developmental.
Of course, this yoinks into question the whole “mind vs body” dilemma, endlessly debated.
And to reiterate since I wasn’t clear enough: there are NO mental health conditions that cause you to swing from good to suicidally depressed and back again in an afternoon EXCEPT for BPD.
It’s not what a diabetic crash looks like, it’s not bipolar. BPD. I know you hate AI a but, but try describing your symptoms to an AI with lots of detail and it will diagnose you better than any moron doctor
…
https://youtu.be/AcN5ltm4BmQ?si=jlj_OEfOb6SsXT0a
(Tryptie? What am I to make of this?)
What were you trying to figure out about it? I felt like there was some kind of negative energy going on in that song before it started playing so I didn’t listen to it, but I checked the lyrics and looked at a few still images from the video. It looked sort of like depictions of negative entities I suppose.
Aspects of the truth frequently find their way into all kinds of media in unexpected ways. That includes songs, books, movies, video games, anime, art, and pretty much anything else you can think of. Perhaps sometimes the artists do it on purpose, but often I tend to believe they do it unwittingly. The way I see it is that it is people tapping into the collective unconscious, which we are all connected to in particular through the feminine halves of our beings, and they can often do this even without meaning to. I have a lot to say about that topic but I wasn’t sure exactly what your question was and I didn’t want to just randomly go off on a crazy tangent or whatever.
Tryptie, we should hang out sometime.
https://youtu.be/rpv-CcRX4X4?si=_jnGAvYGue77TlKm
I am now thoroughly convinced I was born into the wrong family.
Something went wrong with my incarnation
I should’ve been born into California in the 80s among the weirdo literati and esoteric communes
Alas
Or you havent realized your mission for this incarnation yet.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=zMsJsVWGi8Y
“ There are a lot of horrifying things in this world, but I think at some point you have to accept that not everything is your responsibility.”
This is a great start, you are on the right path.
Wishing you all the best.
Thanks!
https://youtu.be/E8cJ1Wa6U3o?si=O4-5E1iHRicZMK5t
Sorry, this got caught in the spamfilter.
Why is it I cannot post any link???
@Charlie the Scorpion:
Um, I really doubt that Rintrah is censoring you here. You could try posting under a different name and different email address, or try a VPN, but honestly it’s probably user error. Tip: You don’t need to use HTML code here, just a simple copy and paste website address is fine. Also, pretty sure you need to limit your links to no more than one link per comment, because most likely the automated SPAM protection is blocking ALL comments with more than one link from going through.
All I can offer is encouragement and empathy re your struggles, and two salient quotes (or derivatives thereof) that echo in my mind almost daily:
When you look into the abyss, the abyss looks into you.
The unexamined life is not worth living (but the examined life may not be livable).
Full credit to the original authors. Your blog re covid and related disease/biology topics has been a bright light for many to use to see the way.
Touch grass, breathe deep and above all don’t be too hard on yourself. The world will provide you plenty of suffering; there is no need to add to it unnecessarily.
Thanks man.
In the U.S. the first thing that they would do if a person had headaches would be to run some sort of brain scan. But there is a Dutch person on twitter (Celine)(@healingfromlc) who says she is a data scientist who just had a contrast dye scan done and she hasn’t been able to sleep for weeks since (“I think I have developed a very serious brainstem/thalamus issue somehow. I can’t eat (lost 6 kg in 2 weeks), can’t sleep, extreme agitation, muscle spasms and doctors are like “meh”). So no scans for Rintrah, at least not anything with dye. Maybe Rintrah can figure out what is wrong with this fellow Dutch person and put some ideas in her tweet feed. She doesn’t get tons of replies so she might see it.
One thing I did, though I can’t RN because of college, is that in April of 2021, I decided to take an entire month off of the internet, only using it once a week to obtain news on stuff. Though it’s kind of hard to try something like that again, because we are in really volatile times, it was a good way to get my mind off of my crippling internet addiction.