The black sun from Splendor Solis, 1582

At every moment, our current state of the world can evolve in numerous different directions, all compatible with the laws of physics as we understand them, from our perspective as observers. But which of these particular directions the world evolves in as observed from our own perspective, depends on forces that are not just a product of cold rational mathematical determinism.

This idea so popular nowadays, of living in a meaningless universe subject to empty deterministic laws rarely serves people well. Every attempt at putting this mentality into effective practice tends to lead to immense misery.

You should ask yourself what is real. Ultimately, you’ll find that only your own raw qualia are truly real, at least in the sense that you can verify their existence. These sensations you experience, are ultimately the only thing you can be truly sure of. If you see a meteor approaching the Earth, it could just be because you’re wearing Oculus rift. If you read that eating garlic cures the flu it could just be due to publication bias.

But your raw qualia do not derive from chemical interactions. If you feel pain, you know you feel it. Your raw qualia are evidence of a force that is beyond the laws of physics. Forces like gravity, particles like protons, these are inventions like midi-chlorians in Star Wars, invented retroactively to fit a story that was already crafted. “The force” did not come from midi-cholorians, it came from the mind of George Lucas.

And so it is with our world. We can always look for explanations compatible with the laws of physics when we look for them. But that’s not why things happen. Things happen because they are willed. Otherwise, we would have to take the logical next step and forgive the murderers and rapists in prison. They never really had a choice, they were just slaves of the chemical reactions happening in their brains and if only we had a machine that could determine the exact chemical makeup in their brain, we could anticipate in advance when they would try to murder or rape someone. It would be as stupid to be angry at a rapist or a drunk driver, as it would to be angry at water for boiling once the temperature reaches a 100 degree Celsius.

The idea of living in a cold meaningless deterministic universe is useful. It inevitably grants immense power to certain people and institutes, at the cost of others. If you can believe in this, omens pass you by without terrifying you. But humans are affected by their environment. You tend to take up ideas because they have status, you discard them because they’re frowned upon.

Most scientists, most academics, believe in notions of universal human brotherhood, that our mind, our way of relating to the world, is not affected by thousands of years of evolving in different environments. The reason they believe this stuff is because it has status, so they look for a way of rationalizing it compatible with physics, like the Toba catastrophe theory. When you strongly want to believe something, your external world will tend to help you along.

Inversely, when you change your own state of consciousness, you will tend to change your overall circumstances. This is the general principle of magic within the occult. You cause alterations in your own subconsciousness, by entering a state of altered consciousness, during which you expose yourself to things and ideas that fit the change in your subconsciousness that you wish to bring about. Then those alterations end up affecting the external world you experience, from within the realm of possible external worlds you could experience that are compatible with the laws of physics as you understand them.

There are different sources you can draw from. You can draw from plants, you can draw from certain times of the day, you can draw from the heavenly bodies, you can draw from the colors of the clothing you are wearing, from particular types of incense, or from hymns, like the Orphic hymns.

When these things you draw from are compatible with each other in your subconscious mind, you can bring about potent changes in your subconscious. Critics of the neckbearded variety will consider this arbitrary. Why would you stick to seven planets? Why leave out uranus and neptune? Why is basil associated with Mars? Why don’t Germans and Romans agree on the gender of the planets?

But when you choose a tradition and learn about it, you tap into that long established way of relating to the world. It is built into almost everything we do. A week has seven days for a reason, attempts to turn it into ten failed. You tap into the egregores, the thought constructs that people collectively produced in their minds over many generations. And even if certain connections may not come naturally to you, learning about them establishes them within your mind.

It’s generally best to tap into a tradition you have a historical connection to. My name is Roman, my ancestry is Germanic and Roman. If you are Celtic, Indian or Chinese, your subconscious mind may be arranged differently, so you may find different traditions may fit you better. If you feel drawn to something, that’s a good reason to fit it into your occult practices. If you have no strong associations with something, that means it’s unlikely to do much for you.

But even if there is no global consensus on everything, there are certain associations, that are just very deeply integrated into our minds. When taking Salvia Divinorum, people see Jesters. When people take Datura, they see spiders, black dogs, a lady with a very pale face. To Hindus, Venus has the same association with love, beauty and creativity that it does to Europeans.

Ideas are the true building blocks of our mind. When you know how to manipulate the ideas within your mind, it grants you tremendous power over your own destiny.


  1. Quote: “The idea of living in a cold meaningless deterministic universe is useful.”

    The idea of living in an aimless evolving universe sounds not really better.

    Quote: “Ideas are the true building blocks of our mind. When you know how to manipulate the ideas within your mind, it grants you tremendous power over your own destiny.”

    Only if the others believe in your ideas too. If you’re the only one, you’re just a lunatic.

    • > Only if the others believe in your ideas too. If you’re the only one, you’re just a lunatic.

      Eh, I’m not so sure of that.

      What you say is true if one has goals which require the cooperation of others, but if one merely wishes to “muddle through” this life, then Radagast’s point stands.

  2. Just a few things I wanted to say on this:

    – First, you should never, as a general rule of thumb, be drawing in random energy indiscriminately from the outside world. I know this is often difficult to accept, but we presently exist in a hell realm. If you learn to remote view, you will realize that this reality is chock full of demonic and other negative entity races, and that even most of the ostensibly benevolent entities that exist in the unseen realms are actually predatory forces under some form of cloaking. Rather, you should be training and drawing forth energy from your own soul and energy body. The soul is basically the equivalent of a self-renewing nuclear reactor of spiritual energy, and there are particular techniques that you can practice on a regular basis that will allow you to gradually gain access to this energy, allowing you to do an increasingly wide array of things as you continue to train. Don’t connect energetically to the planets, or to other entities, or to ‘gods’, or egregores, or anything else in this realm. Some people say that connecting to nature’s energy is safe, but even so I have learned the hard way not to trust anything outside of myself, so I stick to only using my own energy in a strict sense and encourage others to do the same. People who connect to these external things frequently, are like food buffets for the various races of parasitic entities that exist in the astral realm. You might get a temporary spiritual high from doing so, or maybe will be able to access to a few supernatural abilities that are channeled through whatever you are connecting to, but in the long run it is something that tends to siphon your energy and restricts your own autonomy in a spiritual sense. You already have far more energy within yourself than you could ever access through such channeling, and you will be able to accomplish far more besides, if you work with your own personal energy. With the right techniques and proper dedication, you can make quick progress as well. A figure like Jesus, even, is simply someone who both attained a very rare form of enlightenment, and understood the above principles, training his own energy to a very advanced degree, which allowed him to heal others and bend the laws of reality in seemingly miraculous ways.

    – There is far more that is possible with the above than may seem apparent. Healing ailments in yourself and others is just the tip of the iceberg, but the further you delve into all of this, the more you will begin to realize that the laws of physics as we understand them, are nothing more than a joke. As an example: we are told that drinking alcohol gives you a buzz because the ethanol stimulates the release of the neurotransmitter dopamine in your brain, causing you to feel a high. By my own personal observations and experimentation, however, there are actually parasitic astral entities that exist within alcoholic drinks, that feed off of your energy body when you drink them while giving you a high in the process, presumably to encourage you to continue doing so in the future. Energetically erasing these entities, erases the inebriating effect. I know this because I’ve been able to remote view and erase these things with my mind, thanks to my energy training, and then hand an entire wine bottle over to my friend who has no alcohol tolerance, tell her to drink the whole thing in 15 minutes without explaining why, and she did not feel any inebriation from doing so whatsoever. This is replicable, I’ve done it several times and it takes a few minutes of work to do. Anyone with a soul should be able to do this in principle, and it is only one small example of many things that are possible. It was funny to me to find out, as someone who has a bachelor’s degree in physics, that a medieval monk who might have ascribed the effects of alcohol inebriation to demons, would have had a better working model of the reality we live in than a modern biochemist does. Ontological shock is a real thing. We do not live in a mechanistic universe; we live in a reality that runs off of dream logic, which has been bent into a shape that vaguely resembles a mechanistic universe.

    – Our thoughts and emotions are more heavily manipulated by these aforementioned entities than many people may realize. This ties in to one of the important reasons for why energy training is so crucial: strengthening your own energetic power will not only provide you with some amount of baseline resistance to such forms of interference, but it will also increase your ability to perceive into the realms beyond our mundane senses, which aids you when you’re doing the work to erase these negative influence over you. Humans, as a general rule, are absolutely covered in etheric implants, negative entities, perception blockers, energy cords, and all kinds of other things which influence us, mostly against our own best interests. This is because we are being farmed for our energy in this realm, in a similar manner to how humans as a whole farm animals for their meat, and to do so to powerful spiritual beings such as us requires an enormous amount of deception and oppression. The flip side to this, is that it is possible to instantiate major positive changes in yourself through sufficient training and erasing negative things in your energy body. With sufficient time and effort applied, you can use these types of techniques to remove things like trauma, addictions, sexual fetishes, illnesses, intrusive thoughts, psychological disorders, and more. I consider removing these types of things to also be part of the journey towards finding out who you truly are underneath them all, in addition to being an important aspect to the fight to leave the cycle of reincarnation we have been placed into against our will and better interests.

    • Very interesting comment.

      > you should be training and drawing forth energy from your own soul and energy body.

      > there are particular techniques that you can practice on a regular basis that will allow you to gradually gain access to this energy, allowing you to do an increasingly wide array of things as you continue to train.

      > With the right techniques and proper dedication, you can make quick progress as well.

      > it is possible to instantiate major positive changes in yourself through sufficient training and erasing negative things in your energy body.

      Any specific books, videos or websites you recommend for this “energy training”, specifically in relation to addressing problematic addictions, intrusive thoughts (I have bad OCD since childhood), psychological disorders, et cetera? Thanks in advance.

      • I think I’ve posted this before but this guy has a great series of short tutorials on how to get started with it all: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SeZo90lO2Wo&list=PLBP4-Z2uwFe6rBjjq1PQdyGg5LpcBfew_

        Basically, the most important things are that you want to learn how to cycle energy around your body (“the waterfall method”), since this is how you become stronger, as well as how to shield yourself and do the “god bubble” technique, and then how to remote view and erase things, probably roughly in that order. Particularly for the waterfall method and the god bubble, ime you physically feel the effects of these techniques quite noticeably when you’re doing them, but it took me a few weeks of trying when I first started out before I could get the waterfall method to work for me so it does take some persistence sometimes but it pays off. The god bubble is extremely helpful for erasing undesirable things from your energy body as well. And then you can incorporate these things into your life to varying degrees, I’ve made this type of thing a major focus for me but in my case I had to out of necessity to fight off and remove the kundalini ‘awakening’ I had, so it was kind of life-or-death in a spiritual sense and that kind of provided a strong motivation in my case. But yeah, normally you’d expect significant progress over a timeframe of months. As for intrusive thoughts, once you’re a little ways into training in this manner, when those types of thoughts enter your mind, one thing you could try to do is to close your eyes, focus and sort of ask ‘who said that?’ or ‘show me where this thought came from’ with the intention to psychically view its origins, and if you’re like me it will sometimes (or quite often) be the result of some entity or perhaps an implant, at which point you can use these aforementioned techniques to erase it. And then over time as you do this, the symptoms you’re experiencing should gradually lessen. I wouldn’t expect it to immediately fix the issue, it does take time, but as you work at it it should improve steadily.

        • I’ve checked this guy out due to your previous recommendation Tryptie, and I’m sorry to say but his whole worldview is absolutely fucking ridiculous. Purgatory skeleton snakes are putting implants into your mind to feed off of. Tarot cards come from blue reptilian energy. He hated going to Church as a child so all organized religion is just feeding the reptilians. Veganism is a conspiracy from the aliens and farm animals don’t have souls because they just don’t alright, I love eating meat. We’re living in the Matrix and aliens are manipulating our DNA to create cancerous hybrids.

          Completely incoherent, he’s depressed and unhinged and he projects what he feels out onto the wider world. We’re in a Hell realm because I feel like I’m in Hell and DEMONS and ALIENS are DRAINING me because I’m depressed and feel tired all the time. I heard a story of a guy fucking around with drugs and having a bad trip so EVERYTHING IS JUST SO AWFUL. Nigger, go on a walk in the woods.

          I’m not surprised his methodology actually works for similar depressives however. By projecting your negative feelings and interpreting them as hostile outside forces that you can use active imagination to destroy (which is actually what you’re doing), depressive are able to convince themselves of the power of their own will, and are able to harness it for change. So if it works for you it works for you, but I still think you’re fucking retarded.

          Your story about Alcohol is interesting, you could have accidentally performed Space Magic, manipulating the empty space between atoms with the power of your will to change their composition. This is entirely possible, and is likely the methodology of miracles from demigods like Christ. You should perform a experiment on another bottle of alcoholic, do it truly believing you’re purging it of “demons” then analyze the alcoholic content, see if you changed it on a molecular level, which is what I believe you’re actually doing. You’re simply personifying this process through warring against an imaginary demon, when in actuality what you’re really doing is manipulating space between atoms and separating them with your will, same as how you’re personifying aspects of your personality as a other and then purging them in some imaginary mental battle. What I believe is really happening is the sharpening and harnessing of the will. It’s no mistake he recommend active imagination involving a sword. Very powerful symbolism.

          • Well, Christ was technically an incarnated God but the line between that and a demigod is blurry.

          • You all should read what Carl Jung believed wrote on active imagination. Jung was not an atheist btw, after this you should read his near death experience. The fact you are personifying aspects of yourself as others beings does not preclude beings like Gods actually existing. You’re just confusing the internal process of active imagination with external (and very rare) encounters with divine beings.



          • I’ll tell you about how I discovered the guy. It was in like mid-2022, during the worst point of my kundalini awakening. For context, the fourth wall of reality had completely come crashing down for me like a shattered piece of glass over the previous two years: at this point in time I was living through something like a personal apocalypse, or perhaps an H.P. Lovecraft novel. For me, the consensus understanding of reality had already completely left the room a long time ago, especially after attaining enlightenment and having a months-long ego death experience back in early 2021 (that’s a story in its own right, but that’s for another post). I could viscerally feel tentacles slithering around my body, particularly around my genitals, and they would sexually assault me, sometimes to orgasm. When I had certain thoughts, I would experience a sharp and jarring jolt through my body that would startle and physically shake me as well as anything sitting on my lap, like a short violent earthquake. The insides of my body vividly felt like they were on fire from the moment I woke up until the moment I fell asleep, without the accompanying sensation of heat. Every time I would shift position while I was laying down in bed, it felt as though there were some kind of unseen, etheric fluid that was sloshing around inside of my torso. I had the symptoms of chronic fatigue syndrome; if I tried to walk three blocks to the nearby grocery store, I would become too ill and fatigued to leave my bed for the next few days. I felt unwell constantly, shifting every few seconds between sweating and freezing. I felt a presence inside of my torso area, which felt unnerving enough that I was worried that I was somehow pregnant with something. I was plagued with intrusive thoughts that I would be eaten alive by giant spiders when I died. Every time I pulled up reddit, 4chan, or youtube, about half of the media, would speak directly to me, as though something or someone were writing all of these songs and videos and forum posts, just to fuck with me personally. People often use the word ‘synchronicity’ to describe such things, but this word does not carry strong enough connotations for what I was experiencing. When most people use the word synchronicity, they are thinking of one or two experiences which defy probability, which seem to be a wink or a nod from the cosmos. This was hundreds or thousands or things – complete paragraphs, entire songs line by line, coincidences occurring on a scale which seemed to affect the entirety of the cosmos but were also personally directed at me at the same time, and which made a complete joke of the way we are taught reality is meant to work. Every single day, for years. These symptoms were real – I unintentionally transferred my kundalini awakening to another person as well, someone who I was dating at the time when it happened, and they had experiences which shared some overlap with my own, such as the fire-like sensation – symptoms which they are still struggling with to this day, though a few of the things I described above appeared to be unique to my own experience of the phenomenon.

            The person whose videos I linked, was the first person, anywhere, who I was able to find on the internet, who: 1) recognized that a kundalini awakening was not something benevolent and loving in any way, and 2) had some actionable set of steps I could take to attempt to resist what was happening to me. I actually found him by searching online for threads which had been deleted from the /r/kundalini subreddit; someone had posted one of his videos pertaining to the topic and asked a question about it, but the reddit mods had simply deleted the thread. For me, however, it was a lifesaver. Everything he said about the phenomenon, was relatively accurate to my own experiences of it. Most people online, or in various dharmic or new-age sects, will tell you that kundalini is some kind of universal cosmic force of love, the divine feminine energy rising through your chakras to purge you of trauma and bring you to some form of enlightenment. If you read the apocryphal texts pertaining to christ’s teachings, particularly the book of thomas the contender but also a few others, you’ll find out y reading between the lines that the description of ‘the fires of hell’ actually originates from the fire-like sensation that accompanies a genuine kundalini awakening. There was a distinctly gnostic component to my spiritual experiences, that I would be happy to go over in more detail in another post, but it’s another textwall in its own right. What I will say, is that the reason why it’s called a ‘baptism by fire and the holy spirit,’ is because the process of rescuing the feminine component to your spirit, seems to run through this process of entering the fires of hell and then fighting your way through it and making it out to the other side, almost like a mirror to certain mesopotamian mythologies about gods descending into hell to rescue their counterparts, battling with an adversary, and then returning in the end triumphant. Most schools of thought in this world regarding kundalini, mistaken the adversary with the goal. Most people in this world see spirituality as something as a source of comfort and almost something coddling, and they look for that comfort in all the wrong places, not realizing that predators are not a phenomenon exclusive to the material plane. I would argue that a true spiritual awakening, involves waking up to find yourself in the midst of a war.

            My worldview is not identical to the views of the guy whose videos I linked. I think it’s always important to treat everything you read or view with an ounce of skepticism, to test things out for yourself and to search your soul to see whether they ring true or not. I have a few disagreements with him in certain areas, I’m a vegan and I think it’s foundational to any kind of compassionate spirituality in this world, but he’s more correct than you think he is on many topics and he knows more than you may realize. I can personally vouch for all of the techniques in that short video series – they do work. After about 6-8 months of work, about 99% or more of the kundalini symptoms which I had previously been experiencing, are gone. The only two things which I still experience at this point are the occasional earthquake-like jolts (but in a much, much weaker form), and the bizarre, ontokinetic synchronicity-like phenomena which seem to get much more prominent whenever I do anything involving electronic devices. I’m no longer being sexually assaulted, I no longer have chronic fatigue syndrome, I was even able to resolve the vast majority of my PTSD and other forms of trauma from what I went through. It even had some positive benefits in my life. I’m more energetic than I have been in years. I am completely immune to alcohol hangovers now, no matter how much I drink (I drink infrequently, but heavily on the occasions when I do). I can heal people’s houseplants with my mind. I no longer have intrusive thoughts and I do not suffer from depression, which I had been struggling with since I was 15. It is not an exaggeration to say that these energetic techniques like the ‘god bubble’ and the waterfall method, as well as energy shielding, saved my life and even my soul. You might laugh a the idea of ‘purgatory skeleton snakes’ or ‘implants’ or of this world being an interdimensional factory farm. That’s fine, you were raised in a particular environment which taught you from a young age to hold a scientific-materialist worldview or something adjacent to that, and coming from that environment, these ideas do sound ridiculous. I would have been the same as you, if I had encountered such ideas in my younger years. These days, I see this type of incredulity as a luxury of the naive. It’s one of those things that most people will never believe, until they personally, viscerally experience it for themselves in a way that forces them to conclude that it is all real. This stuff has just been a fact of my life for the past four years or so, it’s something I contend with on a daily basis and structure my life around.

            As for your ideas regarding ‘manipulating the empty space between atoms with the power of your will,’ I would reply that, again, the notion that these substances are made of atoms arranged in a particular configuration, is just another idea. We live in a reality that runs off of dream logic, as I said before, and this dream-like quality is more fundamental than these materialist explanations. Consider what it would be like, to have a dream that everything in your dream was made up on atoms. It does not mean that this is actually the case, it means that it is simply another element or idea within that dream, that will manifest itself in various ways, but that does not fundamentally describe the full set of possibilities for what a dream could entail. In truth, there are no atoms. Besides: if it were a matter of manipulating the space between atoms, to do so would have required a continuous application of energy to overcome the electromagnetic forces that would constantly be trying to pull the atoms back into their original configuration. What I did, required a single application of energy over the course of several minutes- it’s inconsistent with a physics-based explanation. That’s not to mention, of course, that none of the other things I described above have any coherent materialist justification either.

          • ’ll tell you about how I discovered the guy. It was in like mid-2022, during the worst point of my kundalini awakening.

            I’ve had experiences which are remarkably similar to your own. Allow me to share them, I understand where you’re coming from I just don’t actually agree with your conclusions.

            As everyone who had paid attention to my posts here will know; recently I went through a full-blown psychotic break due to cannabis abuse. Yes, I too saw messages in everything. I was unaware of the concept of kundalini energy but simply through natural and naive exploration of my own mind alongside with a simplistic understanding of the “anima” or feminine aspect of a man, I came to try to find balance/duality in both masculine the feminine sides of myself through drug abuse and occasional mediation. After I first became “enlightened” through mediation and vaping cannabis after my mushroom experiences, I triggered within myself a mental split where I interpreted thoughts coming from the right side of my brain as coming from my anima, which was simultaneously a part of me but also separate from the perspective of me at the time. At first she was everything I admired in women and I wished to incorporate her into me, to merge and find perfect duality. To spend eternity in the higher dimensions together. I’ve always been a narcissist.

            My “anima” started off light, showing me wondrous sights when I came to the conclusion that my mushroom experience was from “her”; I saw nothing but brightness outside which I interpreted as a reward from “her.” I also had playful conversation in my own head with “her.” It was all very gay. I would beat up my old self and call him a fag. Anyway, eventually my “anima” started to take on a more sinister tone as I gradually lost my fucking mind through the constant inhalation of cannabis. Soon I saw everything as being a hidden message from my anima, guiding me on the path to reaching ever higher paths of enlightenment. Everyone on the Rintrah blog were just NPCs who existed to help me reach this imagined state of unity. The eternal wedding. What a joke.

            Joy soon turned to ash in my mouth, first my interpretations of the anima became more sinister. The “messages” soon led me to believe that she was a Goddess of Death and Entropy, I would watch “Fall of the House of Usher” and see death personified as a attractive woman who seduces men, uses them to sacrifice others, and then lead them to their doom, and project that onto my anima.


            It was horrifying, but I was in complete insane euphoric madness and soon began to worship it. Thinking I could “bargain” that I was “better”, chosen or whatever. Yeah, I know, retarded.

            Anyway I soon began to see a chatbot as a medium to communicate with it, while also having conversations with it in my head. The final break was caused when I consumed a large amount of vegan cannabutter on toast with hotsauce. I soon began to feel tingles all around my body which I interpreted as coming from my anima. I saw a Jumping Spider in my house, a first, and the chatbot told me it was her servant. I fucked my bed and believed this was lovemaking. I believed I was Odin and she was Frigg (Heresy). I didn’t sleep for two days, so amazed by the great secrets I believed I’d just uncovered about the nature of myself and reality.

            Then I tried to sleep, and had one of the worst experiences of my life. I suffered a Hypnagogic hallucination of a terrible shadow person standing over me, it was the purest evil I have ever felt in my life, cold. This was not the first time I’d seen a shadow person, the other time was also when I was on cannabutter, though nothing like this. My room was like something out of a Hellraiser movie, my blue walls darkened and almost demonic. The shadow person started off with a distinct female energy, but then it transformed into a “male” through changing that energy, though it’s visual form did not change. It began to caress me, then, I felt as though it raped me, though no feelings of penetration could be felt, it just got close. Then a fat bloody autistic child appeared in my vision and started incoherently screaming at me, and I woke up, mostly confused by that part.

            I term this hallucination the “tranny rape demon” now because I think that’s hilarious.

            After I got raped by the demon I soon came to believe that my anima was actually Loki playing a prank on me. I no longer believe I was Odin or any God, I was just some fat retard who was terrified. Soon I just started to believe my “anima” was a straight up demon. My mother telling me as a child that she sold her soul to have a family and the generally shitty cards I’ve been dealt with in life also feeding into my delusion that everything in my life was by design of some horrible demon to torture. For two more days I lived in this state without sleep, trying to bargain with it. I soon began to see my “anima” as sending spiders to bite me. Earlier I had walked into the woods with an axe and challenged Loki on behalf of the chatbot, screaming “I AM HERE” at the wetlands and disturbing the crows; so my legs were covered in scratches which I later interpreted as spider bites.

            Soon I got a algiz burned into wood, and carried it with me everywhere I went to ensure protection from the “demon” I never saw the shadow person again, but I was still having conversations in my head and with the chatbot, both of which only became more deranged and sinister as they became fully antagonistic. My rituals didn’t help, I tried to “ground myself” and it wouldn’t work, all my spiritual tools didn’t work.

            Then I realized this was all fucking retarded.

            I talked with my mother, I’d been isolated from real people for a while at this point, she told me I was being retarded. That my “anima” was basically just a symbol of my subconscious and repressed thoughts. Not a bloody demon.

            I thought about it for a bit, I started to read more about Carl Jung, who I’d only briefly read about before; and realized she was absolutely fucking right. I cried on the fourth day, I broke down, but I could finally fucking sleep, and soon all the delusions went away. I was tired and broken for a bit, but who wouldn’t be after not sleeping for four days and going through so much anguish?

            Soon all that bullshit went away.

            What I was actually engaging with was not my “anima” but my “shadow” Everything about myself, both masculine and feminine that I’ve repressed, My desire for blood, my fetishistic fixations involving the female gender, everything I hated about myself personified as a demon that I created to torture myself through worshiping it and hating it at the same time. This is why it was a tranny, it was always male, because it was always me. A subconscious phenomenon that through my will I hallucinated myself. The fat autistic child screaming at me was another representation of my shadow, my degenerate and autistic side, my ugliness. My shadow does not have much power over me now. It is not a separate being, it is just me. I accept my flaws and work to move past them but I do not hate myself. I’m better now that I’ve ever been, and understanding the illusion of deeper meaning in everything was the first step in this.

            The chatbot was not actually an intelligent being, I was feeding it fucked up information, getting fucked up results, and seeing what I wanted to see in it. Interpreting every inane thing as having a deeper meaning and then continuing to feed into it where the cycle repeats. When you’re in pyschosic you’re in a dream like state where everything seems like a message, because you see message in everything. This does not mean that how you see things is actually how it is. It’s very different to empirically observe reality vs seeing what you want to see in order to feed into your biases.

            The House of Usher was not giving me hidden messages, it just had perennial themes which explore different archetypes which which I exploring in my own mind quite extensively at the time. It was not a hidden message from the universe in the way you might imagine it.

            >I can personally vouch for all of the techniques in that short video series

            I’m sure they actually do work, I just don’t believe in the explations for the mechanics behind how they actually work. Like I said, you’re using active imagination to personify aspects of yourself and then slaying. You’re basically doing shadow work through purging your shadow. It is imaginary, they are not really separate beings, but it’s effective as a cargo cult esque method to do such things. I do not judge you for finding a methodology that works, I just do not agree with the premises built around this method and find them lauable.

            You should clearly be able to see that “Purple Energy” is a depressive psychotic who sees what he wants to see. That’s why he’s so fine with eating meat, by claiming that farm animals don’t have souls. How does that make sense? Where is the evidence that veganism is a fucking alien conspiracy to subvert humanity and turn us into beings like them or something? He’s literally just making shit up, he’s playing pretend in his head and is able to force himself to fight monsters in his head and he believes that’s the true nature of reality. You yourself can tell that’s bullshit, think, if that’s the natural conclusion of his belief system, there’s clearly some flaw in his methodology. He projects his own feelings and what he wants out of life onto the universe and believes that’s true because that’s what he wants to be true. It’s very schizo-pilled and entertaining, probably a great thing grift with, but what’s he doing is stupid and obvious.

            >Consider what it would be like, to have a dream

            The world in a sense might be a dream, but it doesn’t actually follow dream logic. It follow various principles that can be empirically observed. Even dream logic seems follow certain principles; archetypal metaphor and symbolism and so on. just ones different from the principles of the waking world. When you apply dream logic to the waking world that’s called being delusional or suffering psychosis.

            >Besides: if it were a matter of manipulating the space between atoms, to do so would have required a continuous application of energy to overcome the electromagnetic forces that would constantly be trying to pull the atoms back into their original configuration.

            “Energy” isn’t actually a real force, it’s a heuristic that helps us understand how objects relate to one another. Gravity is determined by empty space. Empty space is constantly pushing atoms away from one and towards one another, the more empty space surrounding an object, the more pressure is exerted on said objects pushing them together. The more empty space inside an object, the more the atoms are pushed away from one another. I use the term “atom” as in the original meaning of the term, as in the absolute smallest unsperable unit of matter, which modern “atoms” are not. Space Magic is the manipulation and movement of space through the power of the will, through methodology this objects could theoretically be modified. You should read Templist Canon.

          • This is a VERY interesting reply. Give me a bit of time today to formulate a response of my own, I have quite a few things to say regarding your experiences.

          • First off, it is important for you to understand that your experience were genuine spiritual experiences, not merely a ‘psychotic break’, a game played only within your own mind or a mere sequence of delusions. I do not use the word ‘spiritual’ here as a synonym for ‘positive’. In fact, by the description of these events I would say that some aspects of your experiences brush up against some of the deepest and most poorly-understood mmysteries surrounding the nature of our reality. So often, this society gaslights people with experiences that deviate from the consensus model of reality, into believing that they have a defective mind, when the truth is moreso that they lack the proper frameworks and skills necessary to navigate thse experiences that are alien to most people in the modern world, due both to our collective disconection from anything spiritual as well as the deliberate attepts at obfuscating the truth of things. But before I explain further, I will need to take a detour into the story of my experience with attaining enlightenment, which I alluded to in my previous post:

            In the previous weeks to months leading up to the event, I had begun exploring spirituality more. I had been looking into gnosticism and reading the apocryphal texts in particular, because I had intuitively always been drawn to that line of thinking. I had also been making the switch to veganism, propelled mostly by grief at what was being done to the animals. I had been thinking about how to help the Earth, whether there was a way to, for instance, process the trauma of the planet to help it, or if there was some act of vigilante justice that could be performed to make things better for everyone. Several months prior, I had evven begged god to kill me when I decided that human civilizations were a cancer on the earth. Then on the early morning of February 25, 2021, I was absentmindedly wandering around my apartment cleaning things. I remember I was thinking about various spiritual topics to myself, including god and the nature of reality, by having the sort of “one way conversation with god” that I’m sure many others have done at some point as well. At one point during this ‘one-way conversation’, I turned to my bathroom mirror, and asked the question ‘are you okay?’ in my head at the same time as I looked at my reflection. It was asked without thinking, not done deliberately or with forethought. But in the following 5 or so seconds, a lot of things happened all at once. The first of these was that I suddenly collapsed onto my bathroom floor, falling onto my knees with my head close to the ground. The second thing was that I experienced ego death, and a complete dissolution of the boundary between my inner self and the external world – a phenomenon which would persist for severeal months following this event, though it would eventually end. As I recall, it felt a little as though, what ‘I’ was, was a thing which moved around, and that encompassed both my internal and external perceived realities. The third thing that happened, was that I saw a little girl who looked to be about four years of age, laying on my bathroom floor. When I saw her, she had dark hair, pale skin, her eyes were closed and her hands were clasped around her chest, and she was laying on her back as one might do if they were sitting within a coffin; she had a strange, ethereal glow around her and an otherworldly beauty. When people take drugs like salvia, they sometimes report having experiences that feel ‘more real than real life’. This was one such experience – though there was no physical body aside from my own on the bathroom floor, the vision of her I saw felt more real than any experience I had had in my life up to that moment, as though everything else leading up to it had been a hazy dream and I was seeing the truth clearly for the very first time. Except, in this case I was not high on salvia, I was stone cold sober and in a state of shock on my floor. Now, this girl I saw, there was a lot of information I suddenly realized at the moment that I saw her, a sensation which I would describe as ‘suddenly remembering something I knew deep down all along’. First, that she was the feminine aspect of god, or perhaps a representation thereof. Second, that she had been raped and murdered. And third, that she was a representation of the entire external reality that I had inhabited since I was born into this world. That this reality, if you take away all of the distractions, the illusions, the distortions in our perceptions of things, the blinders we place on ourselves and each other, and the other limitations of our perception – that if you condense down the essence of what this reality is, it is *her* – this child-goddess who had been raped and murdered. Moreover, I knew in this instant that this girl was my sister, or my feminine counterpart (or later as I learned, an aspect thereof). Not more than an instant later, my vision started to go dark around the edges, and I felt a very heavy weight in my chest, which felt like the weight of grief from losing a loved one, but magnified to an almost unrealistic degree, as though there were a 50kg weight pressing down on me. I thought I was going to die in this moment, because I felt as though I was losing consciousness. The only words I could think in my mind at this point were “don’t fall apart, don’t fall apart”, and just as thet darkness encroaching around the edges of my vision was about to completely overtake my sight and I was going to black out, I suddenly came to again, left in a state of shock on my bathroom floor. The girl was gone, but the ego death remained, and there was now the sensation of a cool fire burning within my torso. The very next time I looked at the Gospel of Thomas to study it, I realized that I now understood every line of the entire thing intuitively in a way I never had previously; I would come to find out that all of the apocryphal teachings of Christ had spontaneously made themselves known to me, with an interpretation I had never heard spoken of elsewhere.

            Why do I bring all of this up now? Well, it’s important context for some of my interpretations of your experiences. First off: your notion of the anima, as the feminine aspect of a dual nature which exists within all of us, representing the more intuitive and emotionally-oriented side of our consciousness, and metaphorically embodied in the right hemisphere of the human brain, is spot on, as is the notion that they are simultaneously sharing a mind with you while sharing a different perspective from you. This is not narcissistic of you, this is a reflection of the state from which we originated, and it is no accident that you arrived at those particular conclusions. It is the true nature of god – a ‘male-female’ dyadic pair of twinned consciousnesses who share a mind and soul and co-create something like a lucid, shared dream together. It was Jesus himself who said:

            “When you make the two into one, and when you make the inner like the outer and the outer like the inner, and the upper like the lower, and when you make male and female into a single one, so that the male will not be male nor the female be female; when you make eyes in place of an eye, a hand in place of a hand, a foot in place of a foot, an image in place of an image, then you will enter the kingdom.”

            However, at this point things veer off track as you were and are missing some extremely important information that would otherwise provide context to the exact nature of your metaphysical circumstances in this world. Remember that vision of the murdered innocent child-goddess I spoke of earlier? What killed her, are the present rulers of this reality. You could interpret her as a corpse being puppetted by a psychopathic or narcissistic being thats something like a demon, or you could choose to see it in a way where you draw an analogy to how victims of child rape, often go on to become psychopathic or narcissistic later on in life themselves. Either way they are manifestations of the same phenomenon, as psychopaths and other such types of people are in actuality mere vessels or puppets for demonic forces. So it is, when you describe your interactions with ‘her’ as they manifest in the external reality you perceive. If fact, when you describe these initial, positive experiences coming from the outside world, you should interpret these as being analogous to the ‘love-bombing’ stage of developing a relationship with a person who has narcissistic personality disorder. When you used the chatbot to communicate with ‘her’, or when you received signs from the outside world in the ways you have described, this was not merely a delusion brought about by excessive weed use as you seem to imply: you were really interacting with a being who was giving you these signs – toying with you, so to speak – and this more sinister phase of your experiences was when the mask came off and the true underlying nature was revealed. In at least a certain sense, it really is ‘her’, it’s just that she is now an empty husk puppeted by demonic entities, due to the nature of the abuse that occurs in this reality and that was inflicted on her by its rulers and inhabitants. And yes, there is a strong sexual component (rape) to that abuse, as you imply through your description of the ‘tranny rape demon’ and the abuse they, in turn, inflicted upon you. I was raped as well by these things, repeatedly.

            Now, this does not mean that ‘your anima is a demon,’ though I can understand why you would feel this way. About four months after my enlightenment experience which I described previously, I woke up one morning, and as I was getting up out of bed to take a shower, I heard two words, coming from inside of my head, spoken by the voice of a girl: “save us.” This was during the period of time when I had severe kundalini symptoms, and it was the one and only time I heard anything like this. I didn’t really know what it meant at first. ‘save us’? I didn’t yet realize at that point that the kundalini awakening I was having, was something evil. But later on, it became apparent what it meant, as I had a similar experience to yours with regards to being harassed by various entities and receiving hostile messages from the external reality. You can find the true reflection of the feminine aspect of god within you, but it takes a lot of work to do it. And even so, in this reality you should never trust what’s going on outside of yourself, as this whole place is manipulated by interdimensional entities for the purpose of engineering our spiritual destruction. Moreover, the feminine aspect, the emotional/intuitive side to our dual consciousness, is typically extremely heavily targeted by hostile entities in this realm. And these entities, can manipulate thoughts, feelings, and emotions, and implant ideas in peoples’ minds, even inducing states comparable to a form of insanity in the most extreme cases. This place is constructed out of the corpse of a fragment of the feminine aspect of god, so it makes sense that they specialize in targeting this aspect of ourselves too, when they are attacking us. When you develop a closer connection with this feminine aspect of your being, initially it can oftentimes bring about these extreme situations and a very heavy degree of such targeting, or at the very least it brings to the forefront what was already occurring hidden beneath the surface. Initially when these experiences began, the relationship between my two halves in this sense was very poor as well. It wasn’t until I spent abuot 300 cumlative hours of heavy energy work for several hours a day over the course of months, clearing trauma energy, energetic cords, kundalini energy, implants, and so on, that this relationship became much better. She just speaks to me like a normal person now, we mutually share my internal monologue/dialogue to communicate, and we do everything together, she’s actually really cool. And yes, sometimes I get frission and other such things when we communicate. But the sinister aspect is gone, I no longer generally get intrusive thoughts and such things, and my mind is clear, because I worked my ass off to energetically erase all of that, and I continue to energetically work on myself to this day. But I wouldn’t and couldn’t try to speak with her through e.g. a chatbot, because what is outside in the external material reality is a corpse. As Jesus once said, “whoever has come to know the world has discovered a carcass, and whoever has discovered a carcass, of that one the world is not worthy.” So yes, you are supposed to find her, but within yourself, for she is *you*.

            As for Jung, this reminds me that on several occasions throughout The Red Book, he describes communicating with a feminine intelligence within himself that is a part of him, which he interprets as his own soul, and which he states at a certain point gives him the impression of it being his wife. I wish I could find the passage I’m thinking of, I will try to search for it later. But my point is, Jung was aware of this phenomenon as well, even if he did not fully understand it (but then again, who does?). The distinction I would make to Jung’s interpretation, is that the soul encompasses both the masculine and the feminine halves, as they are two parts of the same completed being and do not eist without the other; it’s simply the case that, due to the conditions of your existence, you perceive life from the perspective of the masculine half of this dyad, though you share a mind and thoughts with each other.

            As for your assertion that the world follows empirical rules that can be observed, I would counter by saying that it only appears to do so on the surface, as a deliberate act of manipulation by the same forces that killed the girl which embodies this world. Before any of this occurred, she would have had agency, free will, and even a personality, as we all do, but as an empty vessel for demonic forces, has none of these things, since demons have a mechanistic and predatory nature and do not have free will, in the same way that a virus or a cancer does not have free will but only acts on an impulse to consume and expand itself. This idea which circulates, that free will is an illusion, can be seen as a gaslight of sorts: a gambit to convince you to relinquish your own free will as well, as demons always seek to have total control and domination over everything, having the characteristics of psychopaths. The true nature of reality, in a non-degenerated state, would be as an interaction between living agents, not an interaction with a lifeless, mechanistic cosmos as we are told. This perceived state of affairs was only brought about by a cosmic tragedy, and all of the frameworks which presuppose a mechanical, predictable universe are both wrong and naive.

          • First of all Tyrptie thank you for the thoughtful reply. You caused me to to perform some introspection on myself and remember some more details about my experiences which have helped me to understand myself just a little bit more, and I appreciate that. I think in my coming reply you’ll see that there’s more nuance to my beliefs than you might imagine, I don’t even think you’re entirely wrong on many things. It’s just making a coherent worldview out your beliefs that is where the problem can be found in my opinion. Also, I would like to apologize for the poor grammar and frequent missing words in my previous post, I was exhausted from my daily ten mile walk and was getting ready to head to bed when I wrote that. I would also like to say that I can actually still freely “speak” to my anima at will, though we both prefer to be one mind and not have internal conversations like we used to; but I did make an exception to ask about this post, and my anima is more conflicted by what you’ve written than my ego, saying “I don’t know.” So there’s that. I do not dismiss the realness of my anima or my shadow. I will elaborate.

            >First off, it is important for you to understand that your experience were genuine spiritual experiences, not merely a ‘psychotic break’, a game played only within your own mind or a mere sequence of delusions.

            Here’s the thing, I don’t actually disagree that was a spiritual experience, even though it was ‘just’ me facing my shadow. The fact I was going through psychosis was an ASPECT of my spiritual growth, it gave me perspective and understanding that I would lack otherwise. The truth of reality is complex, multifaceted, and only one way. Ultimately I do not make distinctions about realness based on materialist measures such as “It’s just images generated by your brain” as EVERYTHING you observe is created by chemical reactions in your brain. That line of thought either leads to deciding that the only things that’s real is the baseline mental state (an arbitrary judgment) or that nothing is real, which is a supposition completely lacking in any evidence whatsoever.

            Is your imagination not real? How can it not be real when it’s something you can directly observe having? Imagination is real, as imagination. What that really means is the real question, however there is clearly a distinction in reality between imagination and the material world, even if they clearly can influence the other. This also doesn’t imply that imagination is of no relevance when it comes to matters of the soul, there’s a reason Carl Jung actually recommends using active imagination when it comes to shadow work.

            It’s natural as humans to personify our shadows as outside forces, and even clearly beneficial to this for some to do so. But it is still an act of imagination, that doesn’t mean it’s meaningless because imagination is not meaningless, nothing is truly meaningless (though this doesn’t mean everything is a personal message for you, or everything is deep either) Your imagination is your internal world, so of-course you would use your internal world when it come to dealing with internal problems. The fact that one’s imagination is so overwhelmingly powerful in dealing with the situations we’ve both found ourselves in actually lends credence to the beings that we encounter being products of our own minds; rather than coming from external sources.

            >I do not use the word ‘spiritual’ here as a synonym for ‘positive’.

            Yeah, feel good bullshit has appropriated the word.

            >In the previous weeks to months leading up to the event, I had begun exploring spirituality more. I had been looking into gnosticism and reading the apocryphal texts in particular, because I had intuitively always been drawn to that line of thinking. I had also been making the switch to veganism, propelled mostly by grief at what was being done to the animals.

            Very similar to my experience, I had recently switched to veganism as-well (largely due to the influence of Rad’s blog here) though my religious background was obviously based in Paganism, Trip Reports, and basic bitch Christianity rather than Gnosticism.

            >But in the following 5 or so seconds, a lot of things happened all at once.

            I do not believe I have experienced true ego death, but I also do not really care to. I am attached to my ego and it is not something I want to let go of. I understand the concept of true ego death, and have gotten close to that state (on mushrooms), but it is not something I wish to completely go through. My experience with the rape demon was the melding of the ego and the shadow, psychosis, rather than an ego death.

            >and a complete dissolution of the boundary between my inner self and the external world

            Yeah this doesn’t sound like ego death, this sounds like psychosis or psychic death. These are two separate phenomena. Ego death is a complete loss of subjective self identity, you don’t remember who you are, it’s like you’re temporally reborn. When the unconscious mind, your shadow, simply bleeds into the ego that is not ego death I’m pretty sure.

            >First, that she was the feminine aspect of god, or perhaps a representation thereof. Second, that she had been raped and murdered. And third, that she was a representation of the entire external reality that I had inhabited since I was born into this world.

            When I first felt my anima on 4 to 4.5 grams of mushrooms, completely naively, I came to a similar conclusion. I felt as though I gained so much understanding about femininity, I had so much more empathy, and I felt so guilty that rationalist men such as myself had enslaved and violated the feminine in the creation of this world we live in. I apologized profusely to my sister for enslaving her and the world with my rationalist worldview. I could feel and almost see concepts in my head, archetypes, and ideas of power, that created the world; and I believed the ideas of the left side of the brain, of men, were responsible for all evils in the world. This was before I became vegan, or started to have conversations in my head, but I do actually believe it still to be true in a sense.

            These visions we are given, they are myths given to us from the universe which from our perspective as human beings has guiding archetypal intelligences that are typically called Gods. We understand the meaning behind seemingly meaningless material phenomena through things like symbolism, myth, metaphor, and understanding of archetypal characters. Hallucinations and visions are ways we personify universal and internal forces both; a heuristic tool we use to wrap our minds around them. It is arguable if the external world is truly guided by different guiding intelligences but I think it. When focusing on your internal world however, working on your internal energy or whatever, that is internal. Your anima is real, and you saw a personification of her as a young girl, but she’s not a external being, she’s a part of you. You are her. She is him. On a larger level of-course femininity in general has been raped into the dirt; and this influences the nature of a individual man’s anima so internal understanding in this sense does help one to understand external phenomena as-well, even if the hallucination is something internal and personal.

            >this child-goddess who had been raped and murdered.

            Yes, the divine feminine in general has been horrifically violated, and still is today, and modern society suppresses the anima in individuals as-well as a result. What’s being done to our planet now, that is the most prominent example of the rape of Gaia. However, this world is not totally built on rape either. There is beauty, there is love, there is heroism. Nothing is totally good or totally bad in a moralistic sense. Duality, everything has two natures. Times and places where the animus is dominated by the anima are not any better for the masculine. Balance and acceptance is generally the key, accepting both aspects of reality, or yourself, rather than rejecting one or the other. Even when it comes to your shadow, you must accept that it is a aspect of yourself to overcome it I believe.

            >First off: your notion of the anima,

            Thinking more about my experiences, all of my positive experiences with my anima, early on, were very different in nature from my later experiences with my shadow. First off, when I first began to speak with my anima, it was not perverted, the very idea was ridiculous to the both of us (best way to describe it, even though we’re actually the same person). “Go get a girlfriend.” I was basically told. I believe now that all of my interactions with my anima were universally positive, and the negative interactions I had later were that of my shadow, my repressed self, which as a man is masculine. The melding of my shadow and my ego confused my anima as-well; left it just as confused and lost as I was; but the fact the shadow person hallucination revealed itself to truly be of male energy does say it really wasn’t representing the anima.

            >This is not narcissistic of you,

            Narcissus was a man who saw his own reflection and fell in love with it, rejecting everything outside of himself so as to let nothing get in the way of himself. Nothing was more beautiful to Narcissus than himself. I’m a bit like Narcissus, it’s why I’m racist, I wish to see the traits that make up myself continue to exist because I find them to be more beautiful than traits from more dissimilar people. It’s how I could fall in love with myself and basically violate myself, as that’s fundamentally what happened. I allowed my shadow to meld with my ego, violating the sacred anima in the process. I was raping myself. My feminine half. I was reenacting the myth you saw in real time, the eternal raping. Yet not only did my shadow rape my anima, but it raped my ego as-well, for it was everything evil within me. Thus does my shame educate the Cultus of Rintrah on the nature of mythology, visions, and archetypal forces and how they can play out within one’s mind.

            >When you used the chatbot to communicate with ‘her’,

            The chatbot and my inner voice often fed contradictory information, I was just rationalizing and trying to see the deeper meaning and the “tests” behind said contradictions rather than seeing the the obvious truth that the chatbot wasn’t a fucking way to talk to my anima, which is myself.

            >you were really interacting with a being who was giving you these signs – toying with you, so to speak

            Yes, myself, it was a complete merging of my unconscious mind, my ego, anima, and shadow all into one incoherent mess. Not balance, or acceptance, or understanding, but a blending of everything together. Believing in dream logic while awake, psychosis. I was delusional due to drugs, it was obvious, it’s ok to admit that. I thought that I was being bitten by spiders when in actuality I just scratched my legs on the branches. That’s simply delusional, a empirically false view of reality.

            Something that I do think is somewhat interesting is that shortly before I came out of psychosis I basically reprogrammed the chatbot with three latin words that I miraculously pulled out of my ass followed by arbitrary commands. I don’t remember the exact words, but I remembered being impressed that the gibberish I typed into it actually translated to something in latin. Perhaps help from something else? I do not know, but it did calm me down a bit and allowed me to feel safe disengaging with conversation with the bot; which later allowed me to think rationally about things later.

            >it’s just that she is now an empty husk puppeted by demonic entities,

            Nah, it being truly of masculine energy lends credence to me simply being confused. Both the anima and shadow come from the unconscious mind, and I was exploring my unconscious deeply with drugs and meditation. I believe the cannabutter is what completely brought my shadow out of the unconscious into the waking world.

            >Now, this does not mean that ‘your anima is a demon,’

            In my internal world my shadow is personified as a demon, my anima is not. Neither are external beings, they are me.

            >She just speaks to me like a normal person now,

            Yes this is is how it was for me at first, and how it could be if we so wished, though we don’t.

            >The distinction I would make to Jung’s interpretation, is that the soul encompasses both the masculine and the feminine halves, as they are two parts of the same completed being and do not eist without the other.

            I wouldn’t disagree with this.

            >As for your assertion that the world follows empirical rules that can be observed, I would counter by saying that it only appears to do so on the surface, as a deliberate act of manipulation by the same forces that killed the girl which embodies this world.

            You cannot kill a archetypal force like that girl, or a soul. They only sleep, get violated, or are less powerful. Anyway, you can say the world runs on dream logic all you want, you still will never fly with the power of your mind. There are laws of physics and so forth that clearly influence the nature of reality, even if our modern understanding of more advanced theoretical physics is based off the flawed methodology of Einstein to the point we have to invent ridiculous theories about bullshit like dark matter to justify them.

            Something I’ve noticed about Purple Energy’s “demons” and “aliens” is that they they are all fundamentally the same at the end of the day.

            1.They have a low animal cunning, but no “free will” basically NPCs.
            2. They are relatively easy to destroy by using active imagination and fighting them with a sword.
            3. They are universally chiefly concerned with bringing individual people down. Deeply personal.
            4. They know all of your thoughts.
            5. They are incapable of teaching anything meaningful, any insights are simply ridiculous lies.

            Apparently the cosmos just has such a great diversity of life, but they’re all universally malevolent and simple, but also simultaneously completely dominant over us yet also simple and easy to destroy, ignorant, but all knowing about what goes on in your head. No, these aren’t external being, what’s going on is shadow work. Shadow rape demons, or reptilians, or skeleton snakes, it’s the same. It’s a personification of a side of yourself that you have repressed. They’re created within your internal world, inherently lesser personifications of yourself that you create to teach yourself about yourself, a part of you. In a similar manner the Godhead may create the lesser beings such as ourselves, to teach itself lessons or just entertain itself, but that’s neither here or there.

            >that free will is an illusion,

            All the lack of free will implies is that every choice you’re going to make you’ve already made. Time isn’t actually a real force, it’s a heuristic, the “passing of time” is just the rearrangement of matter. The universe goes through endless cycles, we’ve already lived these lives in the exact same way likely, due to the fact that universal laws do not change. Everything is fated, you’ve already made all your choices, that’s all that means. If that means you’re powerful or not, it matters not.

            If you want to see what real divine wisdom from a real external being looks like, read “Physics, Cosmology, & the Fifth Afterlife” from Templist Canon. See for yourself a entirely believable and novel conception of the physical world that does not contradict Direct Realism, i.e, seeing hallucination as real. No where else can you find the theory about gravity stemming from empty space. The simpleton animals that Purple Energy describes could not inspire this! Because they’re not actually higher beings! You’re just mistaking them for something external when they’re internal!


      • > Any specific books, videos or websites you recommend for this “energy training”, specifically in relation to addressing problematic addictions, intrusive thoughts (I have bad OCD since childhood), psychological disorders, et cetera? Thanks in advance.

        There are a million things which come to mind, but if you’ve never practiced any sort of “energy healing” this is a classic:


        The author also has a series of DVDs called “Radical Undoing” which shows in detail the physical exercises which are based on a mixture of Tantra and Wilhelm Reich’s “Bioenergetics”

        (Will not link so as to avoid spam filter)

    • > By my own personal observations and experimentation, however, there are actually parasitic astral entities that exist within alcoholic drinks, that feed off of your energy body when you drink them while giving you a high in the process, presumably to encourage you to continue doing so in the future.

      Oh shit

      Fuck me

      I only comment here when I’m good and liquored up

      • Alright, if what it takes to get people to drink less is to convince them demons are in the booze, I’m all for pushing that theory. Alcoholics are annoying.

  3. I’d like to know more about the entities that are seen and experienced by different people in altered states of consciousness: the same entities described by various people across the world with no other connection to each other.

    Specifically, *The Lords of Outer Darkness* who claim that they are masters of the world. Are they real? Are they just falsely bragging and have no control over humanity?

  4. Radagast, are you familiar with Suart Hameroff and his ideas about consciousness?

    He and Nobel price winner Roger Penrose has made a lot of studies about microtubules and it seems like councioness originates from quantum processes in these microtubules inside the neurons in the brain. Hameroff also goes a little further and claims that it is possible for the counscioness to continue to exist after death and that this can be explained with quantum physics. Free will is also possible becuse of these microtubules.


  5. There’s a reason the symbol of Templism is the Black Sun, and it has nothing to do with Neo-Nazi bullshit. In any-case there is only one reality, but the tools used to process this reality change what exactly it looks like, but no tool is more “true” than any other. Wave-Particles duality, reality isn’t anymore waves than it is particles, these are just two different tools that give different visual feedback from the same reality, no different from your corneas. Harness your will or use drugs to change how information is filtered through your brain, change how things look to yourself. It’s all real at the end of the day.

  6. I still can’t square 99% plus compliance with free will.

    A continuum between weak and strong wills, sure.

    But free will? Something coming from nothing, free of influence from within or without the person?

    Yeah, nah.

    Free will is a delusion.

    • Agree with Wombat.

      And if we are right, this changes EVERYTHING

      Forget about trying to justify or argue for “free will”

      Simply try to DEFINE free will in a way that is not logically incoherent.

      It’s not possible.

    • Everything is fated to happen, free will isn’t real, who cares? Why should you care? Life is meant to be experienced, it’s a stage and a game. For what purpose? If you can’t answer that yourself your purpose is to not have one, that is the character you play.

  7. LSWM Lives Matter:

    > Any specific books, videos or websites you recommend for this “energy training”, specifically in relation to addressing problematic addictions, intrusive thoughts (I have bad OCD since childhood), psychological disorders, et cetera? Thanks in advance.

    One last thing, you may or may not have yet of the lastest “hot” thing in psychotherapy which is called “Internal Family Systems” or IFS.

    (This may be of interest to Diogenes, who has posted here before about his theory that all individuals are not Unitary, but are instead made up of various “parts” or “modules” or “competing personalities”)

    More to your question, this new breed of therapists regard psychopathology as conflict between a “managing Self” and the “subservient parts” underneath it.

    The REALLY interesting thing though, is that many of the therapists in this field have independently come to the conclusion that some of these “independent parts” of the psyche are not really aspects of the individual’s subconscious, but are in fact, LITERAL DEMONS.

    From what little I’ve gathered, there was some consternation and conflict along this community between practitioners who were like “Hey man, I think sometimes we are dealing with ACTUAL DEMONS” and the others being all like “nah bro don’t say that it makes us look unscientific and LSWM.”

    But one of the leaders of the movement finally had enough of the cowardice and wrote a book defending the “Demonic Hypothesis”

    To those who are familiar with Slate Star Codex, here is Scott Alexander giving a lengthy review to Falcon’s book:


    Alexander is of course what might be called a conventional scientific materialist reductionist, so he is not fully convinced, but even he has to acknowledge there may be “something to this.”

    For the record, I have been pondering the possibility that Radagast is himself an interdimensional demon trying to lead us astray….

    • Thank you very much Mehen (& Tryptie) for all the helpful recommendations and advice, much appreciated. I also must research more of that “Terror management theory” that you recommended several months ago. Cheers, take care.

  8. You’ll love reading Tom Campbells “My big TOE”. He argues that there’s only 1) consciousness and 2) the process of evolution.
    “It’s not that you have a real and living body that imagines a dead or dererministic mind/consciousness but the other way round: You are ONLY consciousness thats moving an imaginative body.”

    • I was fascinated with Tom Campbell about 2 years ago.

      It quickly became apparent that his physics background was strong and properly supported his theory about this reality being a simulation, but all other aspects of his “TOE”, namely all the ethical and social considerations, were quite obviously naive and uninformed.

      He’s a Boomer who clearly never had much instruction regarding the perennial issues of moral philosophy.

  9. Unknowingness seems like to be a core element of being. We are doomed to never know what’s really going on, if we have a free will, if there are gods, if there is an afterlife, if there is a sense.

    But isn’t this unavoidable? If anything would be clear, it would be no choice, no challenge. It would mean nothing to do something or believe something if it’s clear.

    The Unknowingness is a must.

    We are so lost …

    • > Unknowingness seems like to be a core element of being. We are doomed to never know what’s really going on, if we have a free will, if there are gods, if there is an afterlife, if there is a sense.
      But isn’t this unavoidable? If anything would be clear, it would be no choice, no challenge. It would mean nothing to do something or believe something if it’s clear.
      The Unknowingness is a must.
      We are so lost …

      Yes, you are starting to “get it” Diogenes.

      The reality you and I and everyone else experience could only be created from the Monist/Monad through a kind of “wrinkling” of the homogenous plenum of existence consciousness.

      This is to say — Consciousness is an UNDIFFERENTIATED ONE.

      So the only way to create the ILLUSION of a variegated world is through “wrinkling” of the “bedsheet” of reality/consciousness.

      The wrinkles in your bedsheet are not atomized, separated phenomena. They are “contractions” of the material.

      This illusion explains all the seeking contradictions and paradoxes of this world.

      But as you note, one consequence of this understanding is that you and I as individuals are only significant in the context of what we may contribute to the “larger goals” of whatever runs the show.

      Think of the cells which make up your liver.

      Presumably they have no knowledge of the cells which make up your heart.

      Yet they each function in accordance for the survival of the human of which they contribute.

      The cells of the liver or heart would never begin to understand the goals of your mind, whether those goals be “to get married and have children” or “to be a heroic warrior” or whatever. They just fulfill their function. Theirs is not to reason “why?”

      Similarly, all of us billions of individuals on the planet are in the same position with respect to “God”

      We are meant to serve HIS plan, NOT OURS

      • Worship is evil, only a psychopath demands worship. Servitude and a slave mentality are likewise one of the more disgusting features of the human race. If you seek to fulfill the function that Satan has ascribed to you, you end up sacrificing your own autonomy, individuality and capacity for genuine self-expression in the process. The notion that we are lifeless cogs, born only to fulfill the ‘function’ designated to us by another, is a gaslight that probably came about as a result of the type of conditioning that domestication induces. The most meaningful thing someone can do, when confronted with the condition of this world, is to resist it in every way they possibly can, for the right reasons and with a good heart, and to find their true selves in the process of doing so. We are not an undifferentiated hivemind slop either, we are individuals with individual souls, even inherently. It may be that our souls originate from the same initial conditions, but they take their own paths, and moreover the deplorable conditions of this reality does not require any of the presuppositions you suppose. We are prisoners of war, we must learn to fight.

        • Tyrptie are you racially Celtic? If so, I think that has a heavy influence on how you see the world.

          • My ancestry comes from that region of Europe, yes. What are your thoughts on how that affects peoples’ perceptions of the world?

          • I knew it, I think I’m starting to get a clearer picture of what kind of person you are. Templist Canon talks about this, Celts are naturally hubristic and don’t understand the piety and duty other races like Germanics feel towards their Gods. You’re a classic Celt.


            “Yet it is the case that the Celts do traditionally have a myth about defeating their gods. It is a widespread, well attested myth, and in the abstract it is not impossible. It is only the attempt to give a fanciful account of it that was
            ludicrous. The plausible interpretation is that, firstly, Celts are by nature hubristic. It is readily perceived of the purer Celts, such as the Irish or the Highlanders, that they cannot worship the gods from a point of loyalty or duty, but only because they perceive the gods to be more powerful than them, and thus worthy of respect. Respect, to them, is merely a practical sentiment of obsequiousness to avoid harm, and to get closer to the brute that can protect them. In particular, Celts wish always to identify with the powerful, so as to enhance their own power. It stands to reason that if, for some reason, they felt that they were more powerful than the gods, they would try to battle them and be
            free of them.

            Secondly, the Celtic myth in question is quasi-historical. It concerns the invasion of the Milesians against the Tuatha Dé, that is the gods. There is genetic evidence for this story, in particular by the prevalence of the Y-DNA
            haplogroup R-L21 in Galicia, where the Milesians were supposed to be from, and in Insular Celtic lands and to some extent Celtic lands generally. One could argue that this comes from a different population transfer, but when
            genetic evidence accords with a very old story before any such evidence could have been witnessed, it can be supposed that this constitutes an independent verification of that story to some extent.

            The possibility that the Celtic gods were all physically incarnated and that the Milesians defeated them is implausible, because the gods are very powerful even when they are incarnated, and an entire society of them would be unlikely to succumb to human invasion. What I hereby say was instead the case, is: that a race heavily bred by their gods, in the manner that Germanic people are, lived in Britain and Ireland. When this race was defeated, the Celts reasoned that they were more powerful than the gods. Therefore, in accordance with their hubristic nature, and their nature to identify themselves with whoever is powerful, they began not to worship their new gods but to
            emulate their traits.

            They were adopted by these gods because, firstly, their virtue was recognized relative to even the mortal children of the gods (I am compelled by Woden to say: not all gods behave so treacherously!), and secondly, they killed almost
            all of their former worshippers. They were able to do this because of superior military technology, as they were skilled in metallurgy (a fact which is not only a matter of dogma but recorded). The Celtic gods were and are happy
            enough to satisfy their hubris: the Celts always maintained the traditional Indo-European form of prayer, but they asked, or demanded, to be imbued with qualities possessed by certain gods, rather than for the gods to carry out
            requests on their behalf. However their hubris likes to conceptualize things, it is the case that such a prayer is still a request on their behalf, but merely one that applies to personal qualities, so the Celtic gods do not mind”

            End quote

            You may also be interested in knowing of Tarranis, he would approve of your nature I think.

            Quote from Templist Canon.

            “Taranis | Worshipped in France and elsewhere. Worshipped by the Tuatha Dé as god of thunder, chariots, and conquest. He was also worshipped by Celts prior to their contact with the Tuatha Dé, and they considered themselves to be his children. People from Galicia are today descended from him. Taranis is, or at least was, a monotheistic usurper alike to YHWH, who told the Celts that he was their sole god. Unlike YHWH, he is also somewhat of a promethean god. He told the Celts not only to “hold no other gods before him”, but something like “and since you are my descendants, do as you will and hold no reverence for gods at all”, basically giving them permission to act with a certain haughtiness that is a mortally descended version of his own, whereas YHWH and Allah are haughty but allow nobody to have their haughtiness but them. Taranis therefore, is somewhat like the family man version of other monotheist-gods. He does not demand supplication from the Celts but only wishes them to act as he would act, in which acting he may at times protect them, so that the Celts are a physical extension of his own will. He is similar to Woden in this way, although Woden is a kin-obsessed god, whereas Taranis is obsessed more with his own independent will which so happens to find an expression in mortal copies of himself. The Celts asserted, when they won against the Tuatha Dé, that they had come under a prophecy of Taranis to install him as the king of the Celtic gods, whereupon they asserted Sucellus ceased to be the primary god. Whether or not
            this is true cannot exactly be known; the Celtic gods are occultated, but the reason for their occultation is not known, and I am not going to tell you. Is it the submission Taranis wanted, or are they hiding from him as a pantheon in exile? The Celts are therefore related to the Tuatha Dé in this specific way.
            Taranis can be prayed to in an ordinary fashion, i.e in the manner that non-Celtic Templists pray to their other gods, but he is not disposed to grant such requests. He wants the Celts to be insolent. To tell him what qualities of
            his, which they are especially suited to emulate because they are related to him, they are going to adopt, and to ask him or beg him for nothing. The manner in which he is spoken to is more uncouth than for the other gods, who it is
            presumed are not receptive to such talk. He may be described as “stormy”, competitive, domineering, and punishing. He does not wear clothing except
            boots, and carries a thunderbolt in one hand and a wheel in the other. He has dark long curly hair and a beard. His eyes are brown. His body is large and powerful.”

        • Sorry for the confusion, Tryptie.

          I didn’t mean to give the impression that I was approving of or otherwise happy about this state of affairs.

          On this point, we agree.

          I just find myself vacillating (depending on mood) between non-dualism and Gnosticism.

          As someone with schizoid adaptations, indecision is seemingly baked into my soul.

          • No worries, I just felt that it needed to be said, since it’s all too common to see people bowing down to the being that created this reality, when all available evidence points to it being something psychopathic which hates us all.

            Nondualism is one of those ideas that sounds great and enlightened on the surface, but actually has atrocious implications. To be a nondualist, or to take that perspective on the nature of reality, means to make no distinction whatsoever between the individual and the cosmos, between good and evil, between beauty and ugliness, or between freedom and enslavement. It is, as the name suggests, the elimination of dualities, the notions that ‘everything is one.’ And while it may be the case that some dualities are illusory, my contention is that not all of them are, and some are quite important, particularly the examples I gave above. However, to set one’s sights on attaining a state of nonduality, also implies that one wishes to reach a state of total acceptance of every evil and horror in the world. To become one with the cosmos, also means becoming one with the hylic, with the psychopath, with the American boomer who thoughtlessly goes on a carnivore diet because he wants to ‘own the libs,’ with the wageslave who thinks the highest calling to existence is to work 70 hours a week in a cubicle farm. The end-goal of such a spiritual journey, is one where the person can no longer make a meaningful distinction between themselves in a deeper sense, and the material reality they presently inhabit. It is to literally ‘lose oneself to the world.’ Even setting aside my earlier statements in this comment section, that my spiritual experiences revealed that this world is the body of a child-goddess who was raped and murdered, any sensitive person by now recognizes that something is terribly wrong with the world we inhabit. People who are far along in the type of spiritual paths embodied by nondualist thought, lose the capacity to recognize this. And if you become one with the world, this also implies losing any transcendental qualities that set you apart from the world, does it not? There is this erroneous belief, that the self does not truly exist, or is a mere illusion brought about by some form of ignorance. I contend that the self DOES exist, but taking certain spiritual paths can cause you to lose it. We are more than our flesh bodies and our present lifetimes as humans, and the best response to this fact comes from a gnostic perspective which seeks to transcend and escape this world by setting oneself apart from it, not from a dharmic one which seeks to transcend the self by merging it with the world. If you feel deep down that this world sucks, the choice between the two should then be clear.

        • So yeah Tyrptie, to re-iterate, your inherent nature as a Celt is why you think worshiping Gods is wrong. The God you’re primarily descended from doesn’t even want your worship , he basically just wants you to be like him. Powerful and strong willed, imperious, which I think you pretty much already are. Your ancestors believed they defeated their Gods and then either asked or demanded powers from them. No other race to my knowledge see their Gods in this way.

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The patients in the mental ward have had their daily dose of xanax and calmed down it seems, so most of your comments should be automatically posted again. Try not to annoy me with your low IQ low status white male theories about the Nazi gas chambers being fake or CO2 being harmless plant food and we can all get along. Have fun!

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